I probably would have still been sleeping but the power did one of those on-and-off things when everyone is using too much electricity and the system wants to remind you how much we depend on it (spikes). I had my alarm set so I could get up for the dog show that I'm working today so when the power spiked the alarm went off. I have to leave for work in about 90 minutes so I better get blogging.
I am glad I didn't blog last night because I wasn't happy. Mike Brady always said "never blog angry." Maybe it was "never go to sleep angry" but doing the 1970's to 2010 ratio-to-anger conversion I am sure I can apply sleep to blog in current times.
I don't like when I text someone with beautifully-executed sarcasm and the person on the receiving end doesn't pick up on the sarcastic grandeur of my text. Is it that they don't get it or that they are one-upping me by driving me crazy making me think they didn't get my sarcasm? I guess I am a pussy-footer sometimes when I don't feel like making people feel completely bad even though they deserve it for being selfish turds. If you got a recent text from me I may be talking about you! Let the pussy-footing continue. You can hide things in vocabulary but sometimes no one ever finds them with the addition of sarcasm. I was always a pretty good hider.
While I was helping the people down the street load the semi-trailer in their drive-way for the last four days of my life I developed little blisters on the shin of my right leg. It was very hot and I was very sweaty and with the sunburn I got a couple of weeks ago it blistered like it was going to peel but never peeled. It was very odd. Like little speed-bumps all over my shin skin; actually "under" my skin.
After work today Sugar Momma and I are going to one person I used to work-with's house for her daughter's first birthday party and after that we are going to a person I used to work-with's nursing school graduation party. The "Matt Helser 2010 Flash-back Before You Die Tour" continues. Check the calendar for tour dates and shows near you. Make sure you get your tickets...the tour could end at any time. Good thing I am so affable and gregarious so people keep adding dates to my concert schedule. See how I hid things in vocabulary? Why hide things if I'm going to tell you I hid them. What's the purpose in hiding things if you're wanting people to find them? I blame the Easter Bunny for this line of thinking.
Speaking of The Easter Bunny - I think squirrels are smarter than rabbits. First of all there is no Easter Squirrel...that's a big argument for my case right there. The reason I wrote about the intellectual superiority of the squirrel over the rabbit in my notebook is because of incidents with their road-crossing techniques. A rabbit recently crossed the street in front of me and just kept going at his normal "la-te-da" pace while a squirrel did the stutter-step and the serpentine-move to try to avoid the cars. If I had an NFL team of animals I think the rabbit might be my blocking back and maybe get some goal-line carries here and there but the squirrel would definitely be my work-horse (work-squirrel). I think rabbits are just living off of the whole Tortoise and the Hare story and don't get that the hare was not the hero they think he was. As further evidence...there are no rabbits in the NFL Hall of Fame.
Time to shower and get ready for work. In the words of Mark Twain, "you can go to heaven if you want, I'd rather stay at a dog show." (he actually said " in Bermuda" where I wrote "at a dog show" but what's the difference between Bermuda and a dog show when you really think about it?).
Have a great Saturday. I will have something better to blog about tomorrow. It wasn't convenient to write notes the past several days as I was carrying boxes and furniture but my hands should be more free today so I can write down my awesome thoughts before I forget them. If they're so awesome why do I forget them? I guess I answered my own question. Blog you tomorrow.
** no photos were stolen for this blog **
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