MIDDLE Management Why Doth Thou Haunt Me?

Howdy, howdy, howdy! I try to be diligent and post the blog early during the week because several people tell me that they read it during their morning cup of Joe. On the weekends not as may people read the blog because they're not a work. I suspect most of you read this at your desk at work. I think that's great; if I can help you get through your day I am happy for that. If your boss has a problem with that you have them get ahold of me and I will blog about them.

Speaking of "boss" my MIDDLE-management inner magnet must have been at full-polarity last night. It seems there was a shortage of supervisors last night and since I have the word "sucker" tattooed on my forehead I was "queen for a day." "Tonight in the role of supervisor will be Matt Helser." I don't know how that always happens to me; almost every job I have ever had I end up getting sucked into the MIDDLE MATTagement vortex. I DID NOT VOLUNTEER!!! Do I have a MIDDLE management tractor-beam attached to me or something? I am not sure if last night was a one-time deal or it was an impromptu audition but it went fine. It was a good night to have to leap tall buildings in a single bound because there weren't too many problems and the people who worked last night were all very good, conscientious people. If any of you are reading this - THANK YOU! So, baptism by fire went okay. The coolest thing was that after I had to kick everybody out (I mean nicely ask them to leave) of the football stadium (and, of course they didn't want to leave) I got to be the last person in the entire stadium. All the stadium lights were glowing in the MIDDLEnight air and I was walking across the MIDDLE of the turf and I could not help but feel like Burt Reynolds and/or Adam Sandler in The Longest Yard(s). I was just waiting to be dropped. Another good thing about last night is that Roz says I walked over 17,000 steps...either the stadium is huge or I figured a moving target was harder to hit...serpentine, serpentine.

Sounds like some of the Matt Pack and I may go and see Dinner with Schmuck's today and, of course, I will do my usual review and post it over there ----->.

Yesterday morning I was sleeping (one of the rare times) and my phone rang. It was someone form Anchor Life and Casualty calling saying "we reviewed your resume' blah blah blah..." I didn't apply for employment to any life insurance companies though my resume is on a few of those job sites but I don't know that selling life insurance is something I want to do (actually, I know that selling life insurance is something I do not want to do). I don't know that I have ever even fully read my life insurance policies so I know I don't want to read other peoples'. I really hope that this wasn't my proverbial "wake-up call" that we all hear about because I think I just hit snooze.

I got an email yesterday saying "MIDDLEwest Fest is following me on Twitter now." I don't Tweet, though I am a bit of a Twit, but I do "share" this blog on Twitter (so maybe I am a Twit?). Twit or Tweet! I thought "MIDDLEwest" was something I made up; I guess it WAS even though it may or may not have already existed when I made it up. If you come up with something, even if it exists, you made it up right? You may just not have made it up first. Maybe I made it up and they got it from me. I could care less if they did unless one of us makes lots of money off the name and then we will have a battle on our hands. In the true MIDDLEwest we are taught to share. Either way, Middlewest Fest is a musical festival in Dekalb (another coincidence?) that brings several bands to a number of venues in town. It looks pretty cool and if they want to send me a press pass I would be happy to go and blog about some of the festivities September 11th & 12th. I guess, even if they were just trying to get me to throw a quick Matt-Out or Blog-Out (shout out) they have done that but it actually looks pretty cool so I am happy to do it. Just know that I willingly am being MATTnipulated! If you want to check it out go to www.middlewestfest.com. Get ahold of me about my press credentials dudes...we Middlers have to stick together! TWEET!

I heard a new term yesterday that I like - "bushwhacker." Use your imagination, though you may be slightly off, but I love this word. I think I always liked the word "bushwhacked" but I like the alternate definition more than it's original meaning. It sounds Australian and you know my affinity for all things "down under" mate. Some of my very good friends are bushwhackers! And, I also know a few Molewhackers too.

Okay...I am going to start my day...probably by lying back down in bed and watching television for a bit. I will probably watch some MIDDLE Management show like The Office (UK or US).

Have a nice Sunday; it looks like it's gonna be a good one in the MIDDLEwest today. I will try to do something stupid today so I can tell you about it tomorrow. What can I say? Stupidity comes naturally to me! Mama always says "blogging is as blogging does." Blog you tomorrow...OUT!


** drink coffee graphic stupidly stolen quickly from funny-tee-shirts.com, longest yard photo escaped from snarkerati.com, middlewest fest graphic promoted from yourticketstand.com and the office (uk) photo offered redundancy from ew.com **