Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Sex & Religion (not April Fools)

Happy Amateur's Day! (that is how I refer to April Fool's Day). I will not play any practical jokes today or lie on the blog more that I usually do. If you want a good trick to play I will tell you one of my favorites. Get some of those little snap-and-pop things and tape them on the bottom of the toilet seat (where those little parts touch the porcelain). Gently lower the seat down and when somebody sits on the seat they will have an "EXPLOSIVE" experience. If they poop their pants with fright at least they will be in the correct spot.

Because of the great pressure from this blog Indiana Governor Mike Pence has announced that he will repeal the hate law that he had just tried to implement. No business may refuse service because of sexual orientation in Indiana. I imagine it had something to do with other people too like: defending NCAA Champion UCONN basketball coach Kevin Ollie and USC Athletic Director Pat Hayden will not attend the NCAA Final Four. Also, the state of Washington is banning state-funded travel to Indiana and George Takei is calling for a boycott of Indiana too but, they were just following my cue. These are just a few that have come-out (no pun intended but recognized) against this insanity. The repeal is actually going to be a "re-working" of the bill they are saying. I still think something else is coming and this was all a big smoke-screen.
Hello, my name is Brother Matt and I am happy that I don't live in Indiana!

While I was stripping wallpaper yesterday the doorbell rang and Fabio answered the door. As Blog is my witness, it was two Jehovah's Witness members who came to the door. I wanted to hear "hello, my name is elder Price" but Fabio said they didn't say anything. They just handed him the flyer and moved-on. Apparently they are working on volume. If you are interested (since part of my blog is to witness and spread the joy of whatever so I can get into Heaven) there is a meeting April 3rd at 1900 at Faranda's Banquet Center at 302 Grove Street here in Dekalb. If you cannot make that date there will be one at Kingdom Hall of Jehovah's Witnesses in Sycamore on April 12th at 1530. If you do go to Faranda's make sure to go at 7PM and not 7AM (because their breakfast is not what it is cracked-up to be). Do you think that this timing is coincidental that The Book of Mormon is back at the Bank of American Theater in Chicago? Interesting. It may have worked on me - I am thinking about going back to see The Book of Mormon again. It was one of the most enjoyable times I have ever had watching a stage production. We have Jehovah's Witnesses in town here all month long as they use our local arena for their meetings (they are huge meetings using a basketball stadium). I worked at one of these concert-sided meetings when I worked at that local venue. They were all among the nicest people I had ever met.

I have always had a lot of respect for Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel. During a televised Chicago Mayoral Debate last night the moderator was asking Emanuel's opponent, Jesus "Chuy" Garcia something along the line of, "if you cannot even keep your son out of a gang how can you battle gangs in Chicago...?" Emanuel chimed-in, before Garcia answered, and said "I don't think this is a fair line of questioning." That blew me away. That just shows me even more about the integrity of this man. I wish that was how politics were all the time - with some integrity and honor. I know that is only a pipe-dream.


I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon. This one and the one I was SUPPOSED TO HAVE on Friday are the two that, hopefully, will figure out what is up with me. Oh, you noticed me yelling "supposed to have" there? The sleep study people called yesterday and said that they are still awaiting approval for the procedure and I am now rescheduled for April 24th (which is actually two days after the date of my follow-up with my primary doctor). They say that they may move the sleep study up if they get approval before than - she could tell that I was agitated. I will continue to bug them because that is what I am supposed to do.

I heard that there were several secret tunnels under the Playboy Mansion that led to celebrity homes in the area. Blueprints were just found that showed tunnels from the 1970's that led to houses of celebs like: James Caan, Jack Nicholson, Warren Beatty and Kirk Douglas. Supposedly, the tunnels were closed in 1989. Matt In The Middle attempted to contact them all (as well as Hugh Hefner) with no comment. I couldn't even trick the 98-year-old Kirk Douglas into talking to me by saying that I was Michael Douglas. Were these guys trying to hide from their wives? The press? These guys were all Hollywood tough guys but this makes me think they were sniveling wussies. A few of them were even known as ladies men and womanizers so this would have been good press for them. I guess that is why they call it acting.
If you have a trained eye like I do you might see a hidden celebrity here

I am just about done stripping the wallpaper from the walls (of course) in the laundry room. I just have about a one foot section up by the ceiling. I also have to go-over the walls and check for all of those little straggler pieces of white paper-backing that you cannot see while they are still wet. That will give me something to do after the doctor's appointment. My guess I will not be able to go back to work until after the sleep study - I hope that is not the case.

I think I will get started with that wallpaper before I have to get ready for my continuing adventure. It would be nice to be able to come home to nothing to do (I did all of the laundry yesterday while I was in there anyway). I know it sounds like I am pushing-it but I am taking it slow. Luckily, Fabio is on Spring Break to keep an eye on me.

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