Matt in the Middle: WWJD? - Read My Blog That's What!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

WWJD? - Read My Blog That's What!

I decided to wait until tomorrow to do the Annual Black Friday Tribute. It's more timely if it's on Black Friday Eve! Make sure you catch it because it comes but once a year.

On the way home from Plasmatown today I stopped by the store. I had two items that I needed to get.

While I was walking through the parking lot back to the car I realized that my receipt said that I had purchased 26 items and I had only gotten one thing on my list of two. How I can I go to the store to get two things and not even get one of them? Especially when I have a list? That's why I carry a notepad with me all the time for when I have blog ideas but if I actually read the notes in the notebook I bet I haven't even blogged half of them.

When I was driving out of the parking lot with less items than I needed but more items than I wanted I saw one of the guys that holds the signs asking for money ahead. Before I got there I came to a sign on a stick sticking out of the top of a traffic cone announcing that he was ahead with a pre-message about his plight. When I got up to him I read how he lost his job, his wife and kids left him and he was broke and then at the bottom it read "WWJD?" Jesus would probably return that brand new racing bicycle with the rear rack that's locked up to the light pole on the other side of the street and use the $600+ he got back to buy food.

I hate to seem unsympathetic but I don't buy it. I feel for people who are really on hard times but what's up with the bike? I should have offered him a hundred bucks for the bike; it's a lot better than my Murray bike that I have had for about 20 years. WWJD? I wonder if this guy is a franchisee for this business. Maybe WWJD stands for Why Won't Jou Donate in a mafia accent. You're a mean one Mr. Blog...(always the cynic).

If you're looking for a good recipe to take over the river and through the woods...to pass tomorrow consider this recipe for The best damn Cranberry Relish you will ever eat! It's from my friend in Portugal Jennifer St. Martin. If anybody knows Thanksgiving it's the people of Portugal. Seriously...she is a great source for all things nutritiously delicious. Also check out her

recipe page Jen St's Favorite Recipes for other great healthy food ideas.

I am tired of hearing all of the complaints about airport security and the full body scans and the pat-downs. We want to be safe but we don't want to have to be inconvenienced by arriving a little earlier and having to wait in line for a little while longer. The rules are in place for our safety and the people there are just doing the things we wanted to be done. We need to respect police officers, fire fighters, security personnel... because they are providing services for our well-being. (personally I think PETA goes a little too far sometimes but I thought this graphic was funny and fitting here)

You can tell it's the end of the month by my crabby blog today can't you? "Matt-Stru-Ation...A Milton Bradley Game!" Ironically, I am in a pretty good mood but my crabbiness trumps my good mood.

I heard on the radio today that the guy they have in custody for the murder of NIU student Toni Keller said that he had to throw away a pair of shoes because they were covered in so much blood that he couldn't get it out. The police have been searching the landfill for the shoes. I am assuming that means that he has confessed or partially confessed to the murder. Then I wondered why did he flee if he was going to confess anyway? Then I realized that he probably knew he was going to be captured and that's why he was using his credit cards that eventually lead to his being caught. He was probably

running his credit cards to the limit living out that question "what would you do if you had only one day left...?" knowing that he would never have to pay the bills. I hope he was right and he was living out his last days of freedom.

Be sure to tune in (or login) tomorrow for the Black Friday Tribute. I don't know what I am going to write but it will be spectacular. Also tune in to WGN Channel 9 tomorrow at 11:00 AM MIDDLEtime (or DVR it) and watch Boz, Ray and Gar. It's one of the funniest things I have ever seen about Bozo's Circus and Ray Rayner (and Garfield Goose). You have to see it. TTTTG (tg = thanksgiving)...MITM out!

2 comments:

Ventura Beach ResortNovember 24, 2010 at 5:10 PM
Hilarious PETA pic Matt! I agree, it is there for our safety, but wouldn't you agree that we could tone down being too "indiscriminate" and use some more common sense when it comes to screenings?
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Matt HelserNovember 24, 2010 at 8:45 PM
Yes I would agree but in America we always seem to have a tendency take things to the extreme. That's why the rest of the world loves us so LOL!
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Matt In The Middle Blogssary

47% Rule - Matt in the Middle is 47 % estrogen
53% Rule - Matt in the Middle is 53% testosterone
Agitator (the) - Matt's podcast name (revealed in blog and podcast number 2
B. S. - blog stuff
Big Sexy - Jay Cole's drink of choice (Jack and Coke) - doesn't necessarily have to be Jack
Blogcast - our podcast (Dirty Laundry)
Bloggestion - now in Urban Dictionary meaning something suggested on a blog or taking a few minutes to understand (like suggested or digested)
Blogging Suit - like a NASCAR driver's racing suit with all of the sponsors patches
Blogssary - blog glossary
Blogisodes - episodes of this blog
BWAK - blogged with a kiss
Ca-Ching - the sound of the cash register as I try to gain sponsors that will never actually happen (I'm not really that delusional) - same as ka-ching
Cha Cha - revealed to be Sugar Momma's new name on premier podcast
Cheese & Quackers - our resident ducks. she is cheese and he is quackers
Ciaoloha - MITM's new mega-word "discovered" on Columbus Day 2011. It combines "hello," "goodbye," "love," "podcast" and "blog" into one happy little package!
Copyright - something that I think is clever and original that needs to be protected as original intellectual material (like it would really hold up in court)
Dirty Laundry - our podcast/blogcast launched 4/1/11
Discomboobulated - a word Bret Michaels used on Celebrity Apprentice when he meant discombobulated though discomboobulated is an actual word
Fabio - the name my son preferred being called on the blog (the artist formerly known as Sparky)
Judii - the sister I never had but wish I did (my unofficial sister)
Ka-ching - the sound of the cash register as I try to gain sponsors that will never actually happen (I'm not really that delusional) - same as ca-ching
Kajunkles - used for people who don't know how to run correctly. Body parts moving against one another rather than together for the common goal of running (could be a noun, proper noun or a verb). Trying to accomplish something against seemingly impossible odds.
The Lost Sock - Cha Cha's brother (and my brother-in-law). One of the best people I have known in my life.
MADYM - One of my very good friends - Mary. She was given this name based on an acronym of her name by one of my other very good friends Stacee. Together they came up with the MITM theme song idea. She was also our maid of honor or matron of honor (I don't know the difference).
Middle - anything average or center (Middle of the country, Middle of life, average intelligence, a regular joe (or joan)...)
MITM - Matt In The Middle
Ms. Peabody - Maisy (our dog) because of Mr. Peabody
Nature Girl - Another very good friend- Sue. Given this name because of being a combination of Diane Fossey, Caroline Ingalls and Danielle Boone (lady Daniel)
Patent / Patent Pending - something that I think is clever and original that needs to be protected as original intellectual material (like it would really hold up in court)
PFT - Plasma Fun Time - donating plasma - twice a week.
Roz - my pink/fuchsia i-pod nano. Named for Roz Kelly who played Pinky Tuscadero on tv's Happy Days. She goes with me everywhere to play my life's soundtrack and measure my steps with her pedometer.
Sparky - my son's blog pseudonym (see also Fabio)
Splenda - my daughter's blog pseudonym
Sponsorship Patch - when I mention a known product to try to get sponsorships and want to put a patch on my blogging suit
Stacee - a friend from high school that is a great inspiration to me continuously. The Cosmos keep bringing us back together electronically (MySpace, Facebook, Blog...) even though we haven't "seen" each other for nearly thirty years.
Stuck In The Middle With You - Stealers Wheels theme song of MITM. Idea suggested by MADY and Stacee
Sugar Momma - my wife, Jill
Trademark - something that I think is clever and original that needs to be protected as original intellectual material (like it would really hold up in court)
TTTT - Ta Ta 'Til Tomorrow
TWSS - that's what she said
WTF - why the face?

Potato Soup

Ingredients Needed:
1 - 32 oz. box Vegetarian Vegetable Broth (I used Swanson's)
can substitute with chicken broth if you wish
1 - package of Country Gravy Mix (I used McCormick's)
okay to use sausage gravy mix if you wish
1 - 26 oz. package of frozen hash browns

Cook hash browns in a large pot. Cook potatoes until slightly browned stirring often so as not to burn the hash browns. While the hash browns are cooking prepare the country gravy mix as directed on package. Once the potatoes are done to your liking slowly pour the broth into the pot with the potatoes and reduce heat and simmer until hot. After the potatoes and broth are hot add the gravy mix and continue to simmer until thickened. Serve and eat.

** special note...I like it extra spicy so I add an extra package of county gravy mix to the finished mixture and whisk and heat.

Just like I always say - add whatever you want (peas, onions...) and make it your own. And, as always, ENJOY!

Sangria Wine Recipe (reposted from 4/22/10)

I also made Sangria yesterday to honor Earth's goodness (truthfully so I could get lit). I am not a wine drinker because most wines are too dry in my opinion and I am not a big fan of cotton-mouth. I liked the movie "Sideways" though so I want to like wine. I was watching Planet Green a couple of days ago while I was cleaning the kitchen and folding laundry like a real man and Emeril Lagasse was making paella on "Emeril Green". He also threw in, as an after-thought, Sangria so I hit the record button. Well he did it very fast and didn't say measurements or anything but he gave the basics so I came up with my own recipe and I think it turned out well though I made A LOT! Sugar Momma says I am a man of excess - isn't that what "man" means? Anyway, here's my Sangria recipe but I suggest you might want to cut the volume down unless you are having a small country over for dinner:

ingredients (I would suggest cutting the liquids in half)

3 liters of inexpensive Shiraz (Frontera Mendoza 2009)
1 cup of Grand Marnier
1 cup of brandy
1 cup of lime juice
3 limes
3 lemons
2 granny smith apples
2 large oranges
12 oz. sugar
33.8 oz sparkling water (Pellegrino)
64 oz. orange juice
ice

In a HUGE bowl slice the fruit and cover with sugar, mix. Add Shiraz and stir. Add ice to hold the fruit under while it drowns in the wine. Add Grand Marnier and brandy and stir. Add lime juice, orange juice and sparkling water and stir. Let sit for awhile so the tastes blend. Taste and add ingredients to taste (I added a little more lime juice and sugar). Find the biggest vessel you own for storage (mine is a pot like they used in those headhunter movies to cook people which is now sitting on our stove). Sweet and fruity just like me. Share with your friends/neighbors and your boss at review time.

Caprese Paninis

Ingredients you will need:

good loaf of bread (I used Italian bread)
mozzarella cheese
pesto sauce (I used jarred Classico brand - found by pastas)
fresh basil leaves
extra virgin olive oil
tomatoes

And here we go:
slice the bread and brush extra virgin olive oil on both sides of each slice. Clean and separate basil leaves. Slice tomatoes. Grate Cheese. Lightly grill one side of each slice of bread. Flip the bread when lightly toasted. After flipping the bread spread pesto on the toasted side and top with shredded cheese while the other side toasts. Once the second side is toasted and the cheese is starting to melt remove it from the

grill and top with two slices of tomato side-by-side and put a basil leaf on each tomato slice. Remove another slice of the toast with the pesto and cheese mixture from the grill and place it cheese/pesto side down on top of the tomato and basil'd toast to form a sandwich. (They could just as easily be done in a frying pan or on a George Foreman Grill...)

Done! Very simple and delicious!