Matt in the Middle: Testosterone Overload In The Middle!

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Testosterone Overload In The Middle!

[cue the theme music (brought to you by the MITM house band The Madym Stacee Orchestra - MSO)]

Sorry I didn't blog last night but I got home late and I didn't want to wake with you with my hunt and peck keyboard music and I knew the light would have bugged you too. But, here it is now...bright and early.

With Sugar Momma being in Champaign with MADYM (half of the MITM house band) visiting Splenda it is a testosterone-rich Matt In The Middle household. Testosterone spells a couple of things...chicken wings and sports. Yesterday Sparky and I went to B Dub's (Buffalo Wild Wings). He loves that place and I found out yesterday that they have a pretty good Boca burger.

I am really sticking to this vegetarian thing. Testosterone also spells sports (not that estrogen doesn't because Sugar Momma, MADYM and Splenda along of one my two favorite nieces were at the University of Illinois football game). High School football Friday, watching college football at B Dubs, live college football Saturday, Oregon State / Northwestern soccer today along with Fantasy Football and watching several NFL games (tracking my fantasy team) on the free Direct TV free NFL Ticket. SCHWINGGGGG! All this after coming off an East Coast baseball trip. I feel like Oscar Madison with 42% of Felix Unger sprinkled in...I AM The Odd Couple!

I experienced one of the best feelings in the world last night; the feeling of when you're completely exhausted and your body aches and your feet are so sore that you can barely stand and then you lie down on your soft bed that for some reason you actually made before you went to work. But then one of the worst feelings when you left your phone downstairs and you didn't put it on the charger so it will go dead before morning and you have to put those barking dogs back on the bed-of-nails floor and go down and get your phone but then you get to get back in bed again so it's like a second-helping of the best feeling in the world...and then you get to wake up and blog about it...Life IS Good.

Another great feeling that I had last night was something I always like (but rarely happens here) when left-overs actually get eaten. Working at sporting events we get free hot dogs on our breaks. Well, I am not completely sure but I believe there

is meat in hot dogs though I am not really sure what's in a hot dog (no one is) and I am not sure what the exact definition of meat is. Anyway, I don't eat hot dogs because they may be meat. So, when I get home after eight hours of work I am hungry so, last night I had: left over fish from Thursday along with left over shell pasta pesto from Wednesday and coconut bread pudding from Thursday. I never really thought about it until typing it but that could be a nice restaurant menu item. Fish, Shells and Coconuts (sounds very nautical/tropical). Hey nautical should be NAUGHTYcal! (I think I will copyright/trademark/patent this in case the state of California wants to use it)

Speaking of California the biggest city in the MIDDLEwest is going to have a mayoral race similar to what California did when Arnold Schwarzenegger (long video TWSS and parental discretion is required at the end of this video) became the Governator. Richard Daley has announced that he will step down as Chicago's

mayor at the end of his term after being mayor since, I think, 1987. I would throw my hat into the ring except: you must be a resident of Chicago (sorta close), you must have zero debt (not even close) and when you are running you need about three of four millions dollars to run a descent campaign (not even close enough to say not close). Daley is going to be a tough act to follow. Say what you like about him but he brought the city with big shoulders a long way. I say "bring on da funk, bring on Da Coach!" Oprah's not going to be busy either.

Alright, I did my bloggingly duty (or doody) so I think I am going to lie down and pretend that I am going to go back to sleep for a little while to rest up for the final leg of The Testosterone 500 but I know I will just watch NFL Network for last-minute fantasy football tips. I also have to workout today but if I do it will mess up my plasma cycle because I donate Tuesday and I cannot lift after I donate so I may skip a day and workout tomorrow to have plasma off-days...life is all about planning. Plan to have a great Sunday and then DO IT! Come out to NIU at 11:00 MIDDLEWESTERN time to see the Oregon State Beavers defeat the Northwestern Wildcats in soccer. I'll buy you a popcorn (no hot dogs) and if you're nice you may get to meet a real Pac 10 coach. I'll blog you again tonight or tomorrow. TTFN - MITM.

** sports graphic called for illegal procedured from textually.org, hot dog ground up from interviewmagazine.com and da coach photo "flipped" from faniq.com **

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Matt In The Middle Blogssary

47% Rule - Matt in the Middle is 47 % estrogen
53% Rule - Matt in the Middle is 53% testosterone
Agitator (the) - Matt's podcast name (revealed in blog and podcast number 2
B. S. - blog stuff
Big Sexy - Jay Cole's drink of choice (Jack and Coke) - doesn't necessarily have to be Jack
Blogcast - our podcast (Dirty Laundry)
Bloggestion - now in Urban Dictionary meaning something suggested on a blog or taking a few minutes to understand (like suggested or digested)
Blogging Suit - like a NASCAR driver's racing suit with all of the sponsors patches
Blogssary - blog glossary
Blogisodes - episodes of this blog
BWAK - blogged with a kiss
Ca-Ching - the sound of the cash register as I try to gain sponsors that will never actually happen (I'm not really that delusional) - same as ka-ching
Cha Cha - revealed to be Sugar Momma's new name on premier podcast
Cheese & Quackers - our resident ducks. she is cheese and he is quackers
Ciaoloha - MITM's new mega-word "discovered" on Columbus Day 2011. It combines "hello," "goodbye," "love," "podcast" and "blog" into one happy little package!
Copyright - something that I think is clever and original that needs to be protected as original intellectual material (like it would really hold up in court)
Dirty Laundry - our podcast/blogcast launched 4/1/11
Discomboobulated - a word Bret Michaels used on Celebrity Apprentice when he meant discombobulated though discomboobulated is an actual word
Fabio - the name my son preferred being called on the blog (the artist formerly known as Sparky)
Judii - the sister I never had but wish I did (my unofficial sister)
Ka-ching - the sound of the cash register as I try to gain sponsors that will never actually happen (I'm not really that delusional) - same as ca-ching
Kajunkles - used for people who don't know how to run correctly. Body parts moving against one another rather than together for the common goal of running (could be a noun, proper noun or a verb). Trying to accomplish something against seemingly impossible odds.
The Lost Sock - Cha Cha's brother (and my brother-in-law). One of the best people I have known in my life.
MADYM - One of my very good friends - Mary. She was given this name based on an acronym of her name by one of my other very good friends Stacee. Together they came up with the MITM theme song idea. She was also our maid of honor or matron of honor (I don't know the difference).
Middle - anything average or center (Middle of the country, Middle of life, average intelligence, a regular joe (or joan)...)
MITM - Matt In The Middle
Ms. Peabody - Maisy (our dog) because of Mr. Peabody
Nature Girl - Another very good friend- Sue. Given this name because of being a combination of Diane Fossey, Caroline Ingalls and Danielle Boone (lady Daniel)
Patent / Patent Pending - something that I think is clever and original that needs to be protected as original intellectual material (like it would really hold up in court)
PFT - Plasma Fun Time - donating plasma - twice a week.
Roz - my pink/fuchsia i-pod nano. Named for Roz Kelly who played Pinky Tuscadero on tv's Happy Days. She goes with me everywhere to play my life's soundtrack and measure my steps with her pedometer.
Sparky - my son's blog pseudonym (see also Fabio)
Splenda - my daughter's blog pseudonym
Sponsorship Patch - when I mention a known product to try to get sponsorships and want to put a patch on my blogging suit
Stacee - a friend from high school that is a great inspiration to me continuously. The Cosmos keep bringing us back together electronically (MySpace, Facebook, Blog...) even though we haven't "seen" each other for nearly thirty years.
Stuck In The Middle With You - Stealers Wheels theme song of MITM. Idea suggested by MADY and Stacee
Sugar Momma - my wife, Jill
Trademark - something that I think is clever and original that needs to be protected as original intellectual material (like it would really hold up in court)
TTTT - Ta Ta 'Til Tomorrow
TWSS - that's what she said
WTF - why the face?

Potato Soup

Ingredients Needed:
1 - 32 oz. box Vegetarian Vegetable Broth (I used Swanson's)
can substitute with chicken broth if you wish
1 - package of Country Gravy Mix (I used McCormick's)
okay to use sausage gravy mix if you wish
1 - 26 oz. package of frozen hash browns

Cook hash browns in a large pot. Cook potatoes until slightly browned stirring often so as not to burn the hash browns. While the hash browns are cooking prepare the country gravy mix as directed on package. Once the potatoes are done to your liking slowly pour the broth into the pot with the potatoes and reduce heat and simmer until hot. After the potatoes and broth are hot add the gravy mix and continue to simmer until thickened. Serve and eat.

** special note...I like it extra spicy so I add an extra package of county gravy mix to the finished mixture and whisk and heat.

Just like I always say - add whatever you want (peas, onions...) and make it your own. And, as always, ENJOY!

Sangria Wine Recipe (reposted from 4/22/10)

I also made Sangria yesterday to honor Earth's goodness (truthfully so I could get lit). I am not a wine drinker because most wines are too dry in my opinion and I am not a big fan of cotton-mouth. I liked the movie "Sideways" though so I want to like wine. I was watching Planet Green a couple of days ago while I was cleaning the kitchen and folding laundry like a real man and Emeril Lagasse was making paella on "Emeril Green". He also threw in, as an after-thought, Sangria so I hit the record button. Well he did it very fast and didn't say measurements or anything but he gave the basics so I came up with my own recipe and I think it turned out well though I made A LOT! Sugar Momma says I am a man of excess - isn't that what "man" means? Anyway, here's my Sangria recipe but I suggest you might want to cut the volume down unless you are having a small country over for dinner:

ingredients (I would suggest cutting the liquids in half)

3 liters of inexpensive Shiraz (Frontera Mendoza 2009)
1 cup of Grand Marnier
1 cup of brandy
1 cup of lime juice
3 limes
3 lemons
2 granny smith apples
2 large oranges
12 oz. sugar
33.8 oz sparkling water (Pellegrino)
64 oz. orange juice
ice

In a HUGE bowl slice the fruit and cover with sugar, mix. Add Shiraz and stir. Add ice to hold the fruit under while it drowns in the wine. Add Grand Marnier and brandy and stir. Add lime juice, orange juice and sparkling water and stir. Let sit for awhile so the tastes blend. Taste and add ingredients to taste (I added a little more lime juice and sugar). Find the biggest vessel you own for storage (mine is a pot like they used in those headhunter movies to cook people which is now sitting on our stove). Sweet and fruity just like me. Share with your friends/neighbors and your boss at review time.

Caprese Paninis

Ingredients you will need:

good loaf of bread (I used Italian bread)
mozzarella cheese
pesto sauce (I used jarred Classico brand - found by pastas)
fresh basil leaves
extra virgin olive oil
tomatoes

And here we go:
slice the bread and brush extra virgin olive oil on both sides of each slice. Clean and separate basil leaves. Slice tomatoes. Grate Cheese. Lightly grill one side of each slice of bread. Flip the bread when lightly toasted. After flipping the bread spread pesto on the toasted side and top with shredded cheese while the other side toasts. Once the second side is toasted and the cheese is starting to melt remove it from the

grill and top with two slices of tomato side-by-side and put a basil leaf on each tomato slice. Remove another slice of the toast with the pesto and cheese mixture from the grill and place it cheese/pesto side down on top of the tomato and basil'd toast to form a sandwich. (They could just as easily be done in a frying pan or on a George Foreman Grill...)

Done! Very simple and delicious!

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Testosterone Overload In The Middle!

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