Today is my 404th blog. Too bad that Earth will begin it's decline to the end on Saturday according to some nut. I need only 66 more blogs to become a professional blogger (figures I'd be two-thirds of the sign of the beast away). Maybe I need to double up a few days to enjoy the status of professional as long as I can. I made that whole "professional" talk up so I could be one of the cool kids for the final days of Earth. Like blogging is "cool" LOL. I wanna be one of the cool nerds!
| I wonder if she'd be on the podcast? |
Christian radio broadcaster and president of Family Radio Harold Camping ( I will call him Filbert) has decided that Saturday is the beginning of the final days of Earth. Filbert has used his mathematical predictions applied to The Bible to predict dates for the end of the world. Filbert says that The Rapture will be May 21st, 2011 and that God will destroy the Universe five months later on October 21st. What about Halloween? Rapture is the day that Christ is supposed to return to Earth I believe. Filbert's last prediction of The Rapture was for September 1994. Does he own stocks in junk food and alcohol companies and feels this will boost sales? I may have missed it but I don't believe that The Lord arrived in 1994 but that was a very busy year for me. I need to start making some nutty predictions so I can get the word of the blog and the Dirty Laundry Podcast out there. Even if I do make a goofy prediction how do I reach everyone like this goofball Filbert? I need to be president of some important-sounding company like Family Podcasters Network (FPN). Filbert is 89 years old so maybe he's just talking about his personal end of time? Here is my first loony prediction since this announcement - THE WORLD WILL GO ON PAST OCTOBER 22nd, 2011! (if it doesn't, sue me)
I'm gonna work-out today, as scheduled, so if I am wrong and the end of the world as we know it doesn't begin Saturday I will be in good shape and I'll feel fine. I want to endure the pain and suffering as long as possible.
Speaking of feeling fine, I do, but I called Biolife Plasma Services last night to see if they found out why I was "out of range" to donate plasma before I went over today for my appointment. I guess it would have been too much to ask for them to call me as they said they would. Apparently, my suspicions were correct and my protein level was too low. The woman I spoke with said that my protein level was 55 and the minimum to donate is 60 and I cannot even try again until June 4th. I am contemplating starting to eat meat again and maybe not donating plasma anymore. I may go back to donating blood instead. I like to help the humans and felt like I was helping more by donating twice a week every week rather than once every eight weeks (the max for blood donations). I have lots of soul- searching to do before my soul is judged Saturday. If you need bone marrow or anything else let me know...I'm game.
| Night Shift - Batman and The Fonz |
Maybe Oprah should have waited until Saturday to record her final shows; she could have had The Lord as a guest. Very bad Faux Prah! (patent/trademark/copyright).
I thought of a great idea for a new business but the business would have to be a female-run business as I envision it. Maybe I could start it and run it; kind of like a Mary Kay or a Pampered Chef or something and I would just sell franchises and manage the "consultants." Okay, I am just gonna put it out there and tell me what you think. I, as the "facilitator" or "agent," would give my "consultants/experts" a list of clients. Their clients would be mainly men and they would pay them to "teach" them how to make their ladies happy. They would then, in turn, pay me a percentage for each of their "clients" that they "helped." There have been similar kinds of businesses since the beginning of time but I am sure this could work. These business models seem to do well in poor economic times like we are experiencing now. What color cars do you think I should give the "top performers?" I have to work on a training program that I would personally facilitate. Maybe it could become a reality show too huh?
enough nonsense - time to feel the burn. Thanks for stopping by. Have a great Humperdinck Day. Make sure you catch the podcast (just click that link in the upper right there or go to Dirty Laundry Podcast on iTunes) before they're gone. TTTT....MITM (out like a Matt Outta Hell)
cue us outta here Roz!
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