Just Another Pigeon-Toed, Buck-toothed Friday Blog

Great for picking up crumbs

I just looked out the window and saw my neighbor; I have always thought that he walks funny. I picture music that sounds like "doopty- doopty" in my head when I see him walk. I wonder if I walk funny. Sometimes I think I do. It doesn't really matter how we walk but nobody wants to walk funny unless they're wearing huge shoes. I know I walk funny without shoes on because I am sans a big toe but I wonder if I walk funny with shoes on. I think I walk with my feet pointed out a bit. I sometimes wish I was pigeon-toed because everybody I have ever known that walks pigeon-toed I think I have liked. I have never really paid attention to birds but I am sure pigeons must walk pigeon-toed or they wouldn't call it pigeon-toed right? Are all birds pigeon-toed? No matter how Walter Pidgeon walked he walked pigeon-toed or at the very least Pidgeon-toed. Now that I think of it I have always liked people who have walked bow-legged too. What is wrong with me. While I am thinking about it I have always found women who have over-bites or something slightly different with their teeth (like bucked-teeth or gapped-teeth) very sexy. I am going to have to start keeping better track of the abnormalities I enjoy. Maybe it's just individuality I like? Or is that pigeon-holing... Pigeons sure were popular at one time.

I heard that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt may get married. I had no idea that they weren't already married. It is only a coincidence and I just now think about it as I write this that I mention Angelina Jolie right after I talk about people who walk differently. I am so glad that the Jolie-ing fad passed so quickly. That was standing and not walking though I suppose.

I heard the other day that if you had one million one dollar bills it would weigh exactly one ton. I don't know why I find that fact so cool. I think I would rather have 22 pounds of 100 dollar bills because that would also be $1,000,000 but would be easier to carry, I wonder how much $1,000,000 in quarters would weigh.

I thought I heard a car outside right now and I kinda panicked because I am blogging completely nude. I know for a fact that I blog much differently when I am nude even though I think this may be the first time I have done it. The main difference is that when I don't blog nude I cannot honestly write that I am blogging nude. Maybe we should do a nude podcast sometime but I will probably wait until we get a buck-toothed front-gapped, pigeon-toed Super Model as a guest before I play that card. Is Taye Diggs pigeon-toed? Nevermind... he has perfect teeth.

The United States Secret Service prostitution scandal is getting entertaining. One of agents that was fired, David Randall Chaney, who was in charge of protecting Sarah Palin during the 2008 Presidential campaign, was quoted as saying, "I was really checking her (Palin) out, if you know what I mean?" I am not really sure what he means but I know what it implies I think. It would be pretty funny if he is related to Dick Chaney for a few reasons. Prostitution is legal in Columbia and these guys were presumably off-duty so I am not really sure how I feel about this. I think prostitution is bad because it generally seems to prey on the people who are prostituting themselves but I am not sure if I am just saying that because it is the politically-correct thing to say or it's what I really believe. I think I could be easily swayed one way or another on the issue. Unfortunately, in most cases, it seems that some people are forced into prostitution and they don't reap the financial benefits of their "labors." I am pretty sure I am against it. It also probably spreads disease and it seems to me, from the movies mainly, that drugs and guns and violence follow it. That's pretty much true with anything where large amounts of money are exchanged - like government!

I was thinking last night, because it was on my TO DO list to think at least once yesterday, that there needs to be some new swear words. On this week's Dirty Laundry Podcast I am going to try to introduce some new swear words that we can use before they become main-stream and we have to stop using them on the podcast without an EXPLICIT labeling. I do not have any in mind right now but that is my self-imposed project between now and Sunday afternoon. If you have any ideas for new swear words please send them to me and I will give you full credit on the podcast (unless you want anonymity and then I will provide that for you - Secret Service Style ;) ) Please send them to me at dirtylaundrybag@gmail.com How else will new swear words get invented if we don't do it? If you want something done right you've gotta do it yourself.

Though I sat down to write this blog with nothing in mind (like I spend most of my time) it seems that it turned down the one-track that I often spend most of my time on pretty quickly. It must be the right track though because I have often been told that I am on the right track. If I'm on the right one why do I need another one? Thank you for spending time here with me on this track and for listening to what I had to type (actually it just sounds like keys clicking if you translate it into sound). I always appreciate you being here and I appreciate all of the kind words yesterday about the blog "being back." Bloggy Got Back! Have a great Friday night and an even greater weekend.  TTTT...MITM (out waiting for your new swear words with bated breath - what is bated breath anyway? - you know my mind already went to that one-track again and now so did yours with me as the Engineer) TA!