Matt in the Middle: The Fickle Finger of Fate Blog!!!

Thursday, March 10, 2011

The Fickle Finger of Fate Blog!!!

The MITM Fickle Finger of Fate Award goes to...Me!

I left the house this morning on the way to get rid of some unwanted plasma. As I got to the front of the subdivision, maybe it's the back when I'm leaving I'm not sure how that works, I realized that I didn't have Roz's leash (headphones/ear buds) with me. I hesitated for a moment and thought about turning around, I actually made one of those half-turn deals like I was starting to turn, but decided I could do without the music while donating this morning. I just like the music to drown out the distractions around me so I can read Mr. Twain.That was the beginning of the downward spiral of the morning. Maybe it was something going on similar to The Adjustment Bureau, the movie I reviewed yesterday at Middle Movie Reviews. Maybe something was trying to change my fate for the day? So, I went over and went through the usual procedures at BioLife plasma center. While the lady was checking my blood I asked her if she could let me know the protein level because last time I was at 61 and really amp'ed up the protein over the last couple of days and I wanted to make sure it was working. After a bit she turned to me and said, "it's 59...too low to donate." I am totally straddling that 60 cut-off mark. I don't really care that much about the donating but what in the heck is going on with my protein? Between yesterday and this morning I had 2 protein bars, two scoops of protein powder (two scoops like Raisin Bran) in my morning shake when I usually only have one scoop, had a Smart Ones egg sandwich for breakfast and I had fish for lunch yesterday and shrimp for dinner last night. So then, being turned away like Baby Cheeses, I go grocery shopping (and buy more wasabi and soy sauce almonds because I had run out) and then go to Border's to get a book about Garageband to learn more for the podcast; they don't open until 10:00. Everything was thrown outta whack today and I probably would have met someone that would have changed my life had things changed. Maybe I would have been killed...who knows? Not me! But, it did change today's blog already with that incredibly long paragraph...damn you MITM's Adjustment Bureau!!!

That really is going to change the blog a lot today. I have a lot of great, award-winning notes in the blog book and now they will put off until tomorrow or perhaps never even be used.

Chuck is a nickname for Charlie isn't it? Suspicious!

My good friend Sergeant John posted something on his Facebook page yesterday that made me think about the possibilities for Two and a Half Men after the firing of Charlie ~~Manson~~ Sheen. It was a clip of the show Roseanne when they replaced the actress who played the Becky character. It became a running gag on the show. There have been so many occasions in television when they just replaced characters and moved on. There were two different Darren's in Bewitched, the two different Becky's on Roseanne, two different Glady Kravitzes on Bewitched, an entire season that was a dream (season eight) on Dallas and an entire series that was a dream on Newhart when Dick Loudon woke up as Dick Hartley and his wife was the wife from his previous series The Bob Newhart Show. Aunt Vivian on Fresh Prince of Bel-Air sure changed a lot. What in the Helser happen to Chuck Cunningham on Happy Days? He just up and disappeared. Just throw me in there and I will just be Uncle Charlie on Two and a Half Men - no big whoop. Better yet, have Gavan O' Herilhy step in and take over the role.

I found out that it was National Crabmeat Day yesterday after I, coincidentally, ate imitation crabmeat for lunch. I am subconsciously almost in-tune with the days. Imitation crab is the sincerest form of crabmeat flattery I understand.

Since the MITM Adjustment Bureau changed the blog for today I probably didn't blog something that would have caused your life to change. One tiny ripple in my blog may have caused you to have a better or worse day. If you have a great day I will take credit and, likewise, if you have a bad day I will take the blame. Please have a nice day because I do tend to blame myself for everything; it comes from low protein levels I think. TTTT...MITM (Garagebanding out) TA!

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Matt In The Middle Blogssary

47% Rule - Matt in the Middle is 47 % estrogen
53% Rule - Matt in the Middle is 53% testosterone
Agitator (the) - Matt's podcast name (revealed in blog and podcast number 2
B. S. - blog stuff
Big Sexy - Jay Cole's drink of choice (Jack and Coke) - doesn't necessarily have to be Jack
Blogcast - our podcast (Dirty Laundry)
Bloggestion - now in Urban Dictionary meaning something suggested on a blog or taking a few minutes to understand (like suggested or digested)
Blogging Suit - like a NASCAR driver's racing suit with all of the sponsors patches
Blogssary - blog glossary
Blogisodes - episodes of this blog
BWAK - blogged with a kiss
Ca-Ching - the sound of the cash register as I try to gain sponsors that will never actually happen (I'm not really that delusional) - same as ka-ching
Cha Cha - revealed to be Sugar Momma's new name on premier podcast
Cheese & Quackers - our resident ducks. she is cheese and he is quackers
Ciaoloha - MITM's new mega-word "discovered" on Columbus Day 2011. It combines "hello," "goodbye," "love," "podcast" and "blog" into one happy little package!
Copyright - something that I think is clever and original that needs to be protected as original intellectual material (like it would really hold up in court)
Dirty Laundry - our podcast/blogcast launched 4/1/11
Discomboobulated - a word Bret Michaels used on Celebrity Apprentice when he meant discombobulated though discomboobulated is an actual word
Fabio - the name my son preferred being called on the blog (the artist formerly known as Sparky)
Judii - the sister I never had but wish I did (my unofficial sister)
Ka-ching - the sound of the cash register as I try to gain sponsors that will never actually happen (I'm not really that delusional) - same as ca-ching
Kajunkles - used for people who don't know how to run correctly. Body parts moving against one another rather than together for the common goal of running (could be a noun, proper noun or a verb). Trying to accomplish something against seemingly impossible odds.
The Lost Sock - Cha Cha's brother (and my brother-in-law). One of the best people I have known in my life.
MADYM - One of my very good friends - Mary. She was given this name based on an acronym of her name by one of my other very good friends Stacee. Together they came up with the MITM theme song idea. She was also our maid of honor or matron of honor (I don't know the difference).
Middle - anything average or center (Middle of the country, Middle of life, average intelligence, a regular joe (or joan)...)
MITM - Matt In The Middle
Ms. Peabody - Maisy (our dog) because of Mr. Peabody
Nature Girl - Another very good friend- Sue. Given this name because of being a combination of Diane Fossey, Caroline Ingalls and Danielle Boone (lady Daniel)
Patent / Patent Pending - something that I think is clever and original that needs to be protected as original intellectual material (like it would really hold up in court)
PFT - Plasma Fun Time - donating plasma - twice a week.
Roz - my pink/fuchsia i-pod nano. Named for Roz Kelly who played Pinky Tuscadero on tv's Happy Days. She goes with me everywhere to play my life's soundtrack and measure my steps with her pedometer.
Sparky - my son's blog pseudonym (see also Fabio)
Splenda - my daughter's blog pseudonym
Sponsorship Patch - when I mention a known product to try to get sponsorships and want to put a patch on my blogging suit
Stacee - a friend from high school that is a great inspiration to me continuously. The Cosmos keep bringing us back together electronically (MySpace, Facebook, Blog...) even though we haven't "seen" each other for nearly thirty years.
Stuck In The Middle With You - Stealers Wheels theme song of MITM. Idea suggested by MADY and Stacee
Sugar Momma - my wife, Jill
Trademark - something that I think is clever and original that needs to be protected as original intellectual material (like it would really hold up in court)
TTTT - Ta Ta 'Til Tomorrow
TWSS - that's what she said
WTF - why the face?

Potato Soup

Ingredients Needed:
1 - 32 oz. box Vegetarian Vegetable Broth (I used Swanson's)
can substitute with chicken broth if you wish
1 - package of Country Gravy Mix (I used McCormick's)
okay to use sausage gravy mix if you wish
1 - 26 oz. package of frozen hash browns

Cook hash browns in a large pot. Cook potatoes until slightly browned stirring often so as not to burn the hash browns. While the hash browns are cooking prepare the country gravy mix as directed on package. Once the potatoes are done to your liking slowly pour the broth into the pot with the potatoes and reduce heat and simmer until hot. After the potatoes and broth are hot add the gravy mix and continue to simmer until thickened. Serve and eat.

** special note...I like it extra spicy so I add an extra package of county gravy mix to the finished mixture and whisk and heat.

Just like I always say - add whatever you want (peas, onions...) and make it your own. And, as always, ENJOY!

Sangria Wine Recipe (reposted from 4/22/10)

I also made Sangria yesterday to honor Earth's goodness (truthfully so I could get lit). I am not a wine drinker because most wines are too dry in my opinion and I am not a big fan of cotton-mouth. I liked the movie "Sideways" though so I want to like wine. I was watching Planet Green a couple of days ago while I was cleaning the kitchen and folding laundry like a real man and Emeril Lagasse was making paella on "Emeril Green". He also threw in, as an after-thought, Sangria so I hit the record button. Well he did it very fast and didn't say measurements or anything but he gave the basics so I came up with my own recipe and I think it turned out well though I made A LOT! Sugar Momma says I am a man of excess - isn't that what "man" means? Anyway, here's my Sangria recipe but I suggest you might want to cut the volume down unless you are having a small country over for dinner:

ingredients (I would suggest cutting the liquids in half)

3 liters of inexpensive Shiraz (Frontera Mendoza 2009)
1 cup of Grand Marnier
1 cup of brandy
1 cup of lime juice
3 limes
3 lemons
2 granny smith apples
2 large oranges
12 oz. sugar
33.8 oz sparkling water (Pellegrino)
64 oz. orange juice
ice

In a HUGE bowl slice the fruit and cover with sugar, mix. Add Shiraz and stir. Add ice to hold the fruit under while it drowns in the wine. Add Grand Marnier and brandy and stir. Add lime juice, orange juice and sparkling water and stir. Let sit for awhile so the tastes blend. Taste and add ingredients to taste (I added a little more lime juice and sugar). Find the biggest vessel you own for storage (mine is a pot like they used in those headhunter movies to cook people which is now sitting on our stove). Sweet and fruity just like me. Share with your friends/neighbors and your boss at review time.

Caprese Paninis

Ingredients you will need:

good loaf of bread (I used Italian bread)
mozzarella cheese
pesto sauce (I used jarred Classico brand - found by pastas)
fresh basil leaves
extra virgin olive oil
tomatoes

And here we go:
slice the bread and brush extra virgin olive oil on both sides of each slice. Clean and separate basil leaves. Slice tomatoes. Grate Cheese. Lightly grill one side of each slice of bread. Flip the bread when lightly toasted. After flipping the bread spread pesto on the toasted side and top with shredded cheese while the other side toasts. Once the second side is toasted and the cheese is starting to melt remove it from the

grill and top with two slices of tomato side-by-side and put a basil leaf on each tomato slice. Remove another slice of the toast with the pesto and cheese mixture from the grill and place it cheese/pesto side down on top of the tomato and basil'd toast to form a sandwich. (They could just as easily be done in a frying pan or on a George Foreman Grill...)

Done! Very simple and delicious!

Thursday, March 10, 2011

The Fickle Finger of Fate Blog!!!

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