Considering Confession - I am From Neptune

Stipe with hair!

In case you're keeping score I think I have a sinus headache or maybe a tumor. I haven't checked the line in Vegas but if you want some inside info before betting - the smart money is on the sinuses.

Saturday was Michael Stipe's birthday. In honor of the R.E.M. lead singer Paste Magazine tweeted "Happy Birthday, Michael Stipe! Here are the 20 best R.E.M. songs." I asked them "what is number 21?" The top ten lists drive me crazy enough but now we're gonna have top twenty lists? Where is it gonna end? I did not read the list but I bet my list and theirs' is not the same. If we were all the same there would only need to be one movie and one song. It sure is pretentious to tell me what the top anything is. Maybe it should be "the top 20 as far as we're concerned."

Words With Friends is adding a todo list to my life. I have this huge list of people waiting for me to play because our schedules are different. There needs to be a book of Words With Friends etiquette. Usually, when I win a game, I don't start a new game with that person. I will let them start the next game if they want to replay me. But they may be waiting for me and think I don't find them a worthy opponent? If someone sends me a request to play and I decline will they be sad? I need to get that book written before this craze dies in about three months but I don't have time with all of the Words With Friends games I have to get caught up on. There are some people that I really like to play with because it sort of keeps me in touch with them in a weird sad sorta way but some people I barely know and I have three games going with them. I bet the people back in The Great Depression or people living in third-world countries struggling to survive another day would love to have problems like this.

Twitter is another weird phenomenon to me. People like certain celebs and places and things and then we listen to what they have to say. Then, if they say something they like they retweet you and you feel important. Hey, follow me on Twitter - Matt The Agitator. I am not really sure why but it seems like all the cool kids are doing it! And some of the other ones, like me, too.

It slows people down and cuts down on paperwork. (Cortland, IL)

Remember that week I talked about that Muffin Top infomercial? It is a product to hide gunts. The problem with a muffin top is that a muffin is usually topped with frosting. I guess that really makes that a cupcake but what is a muffin but a snooty sweet muffin? "If I have to wear a Muffin Top girdle why do you want me to think about frosting" I thought. So I get fatter and have to buy more of your products. Sneaky bastards!

Last Wednesday I blogged about Aurora, Illinois' second largest city, not having any homicides for 2012; the first year with zero homicides for over 60 years. I put that photo up showing why the crime rate may have been down.

I cannot believe there is a penalty in the NFL for taunting. The game is brutal but there is a problem with saying "na na na na na you are a poopy pants!" That just cracks me up. It's the entire opposite of Sticks and Stones. That Sticks and Stones comment was Cha Cha's!

I have talked about how bad Les Miserables is on here and on Dirty Laundry Podcast but I cannot get Sasha Baron Cohen's version of Master of the House out of my head. I even downloaded in from iTunes and it's on my iPod.

Mattster of the blog, doling out the charm
Ready with a handshake and an open palm
Tells a saucy tale, makes a little stir...

Lance considering!

I heard that super cyclist Lance Armstrong "is considering making a doping confession." He used performance enhancing drugs (barely allegedly) and has had all of his cycling titles stripped from him. Does he even need to confess if he is "thinking of confessing?" Thinking about confessing is pretty much confirmation that he used the drugs I think. Maybe not. I guess I could say that I am going to confess that I am from Neptune but until I do I suppose it's just conjecture or me trying to get myself in the news. Unless it is true what purpose does it serve?

I will let you go as I have prattled on today. Tomorrow we will record the gun control talk for Dirty Laundry Podcast but I should still be able to blog tomorrow. After all, this is my Friday and the weekend always makes us able to do things that we normally couldn't do. Have a great rest of your day and thanks, as always, for hanging your hat for awhile; we really should wear hats more. TTTT...MITM (out)