Call Me Pippa From Bucklebury!

The sun is finally out in the MIDDLEwest. It has chosen to shine in liquid form today for easier digestion. It is a great disguise because it looks an awful lot like the rain we have been having for weeks. It can't fool me though.

You can tell he's boasting...his mouth's open!

I am not very much of a political person but I definitely am liberal on most issues though. You know me, I am pretty much MIDDLE on just about everything. I live in the Vanilla MIDDLEwest what do you expect? I really, really, really hope Donald Trump runs for President though I am sure he will not because he doesn't want us to see his financials. While I was donating plasma today, without a hitch, I was listening to press conferences by both Donald Trump and President Obama. All Trump kept talking about was how successful he is and how successful his show is and then he would mention what night and time his show is on. His big issue, as has been his campaign platform thus far, has been President Obama's birth certificate. So, the White House produced the Record of Live Birth from the hospital in Hawaii, and during the President's press conference he said that it's hard for the country because we "can't focus on problems if (we) are distracted by side shows and carnival barkers." He went on to say that we "don't have time for this silliness, we have better things to do." He's been President for four years. Shouldn't that have been proof enough that he was a U.S. citizen? You have to be an American citizen to be President of the United States. Seems like The Supreme Court or someone wouldn't have let him run the country is he wasn't a citizen. The reason I want Trump to run is so we can have Presidential debates between self-pumper (TWSS) Trump and President Obama. I also saw a clip of Gary Busey campaigning for Trump today...I smell Vice Presidential carnival barker candidate LOL!

The jury selection for former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich's trial is underway. The reason I mention it, as it seems like old news considering the controversy has been going on for years, is that one of the potential jurors may be excused from serving on the jury for a very unique reason. If she does not get excused for this reason the judge is considering not having court for the one day this lady has a problem with. Is it a religious reason? NO. Is it an illness with her or a family member? NO. She has tickets to one of the final Oprah shows. Are you kidding me? I will lose all faith, what little I have left, in out justice system if this is a reason to halt a day of court. Maybe I hold government and civic responsibility in too high regard. We have become a country run by entertainment and sensationalism. I know I personally have but that's why I don't work in government. Maybe I am more qualified for public office that I knew.

Mike R. Phone knows we can work Blue

The new episode of the Dirty Laundry podcast is ready on iTunes. Cha Cha let a rather colorful word fly in this episode. MADYM posted on my Facebook page that maybe we should change the name of the podcast to Dirty Language. That cracks me up. In the words of Homer Simpson, "it's funny because it's true." We have a new microphone this week too so I think she was just waiting to drop the "C-bomb" (the #2 C-Bomb I guess) for when everybody could hear it clearly. Don't worry about having the youngsters and those of you with sensitive ears hearing the podcast this week though. Our crack editing staff was all over it (TWSS) to keep this episode from getting an EXPLICIT label. If you haven't heard the show yet this is our fifth installment. Go to iTunes and go to "audio podcasts" and search either "Dirty Laundry Podcast" or "Matt Helser." People all over the world seem to like it - really...ALL OVER THE WORLD!

I want to change my name to Pippa and live in Bucklebury, Endland.

I guess that's enough of my gas for today. You should be happy with all of the free gas I give you every day; have you seen the price of gas? I kill me! I'll be here all week...tell you friends. Don't forget to tip you bartenders and waitresses and waiters (25%+). Seriously, thanks a lot for dropping in and for listening to Dirty Language Laundry. My hope is to top the 500 download mark this week with our fifth show. I think an average of 100 downloads per episode while we are still new is pretty good and so far we have managed to do that thanks to you listening and passing it along. I heard sun on Saturday in the MIDDLEwest...that's Cha Cha and my anniversary so sun would make sense. TTTT...MITM (downloading the new load). TA!