Do I Offend?

That could mean so many things

A week or so ago I wrote about how my cul-de-sac (soon to be mine anyway) seems to be going on the market one home at a time. At that time there were two homes with signs in front of them and the one at the end of the sac (the one you would run into if you drove straight out and didn't turn) is sold and they packed up the truck and moved to Beverly (or wherever they went) two days ago. Now there is a third with a sign and two that I hear word that will be on the market soon. Do I offend? I thought everybody thought fart noises were funny. If those other two go up soon we will have half the houses in the circle for sale.

It seems like I will not be able to go with the family for Easter. I will probably be spending another holiday Home Alone. It all depends on whether I make a stink and, how the outcome of said stink-making turns out. I am not much of a stink-maker at work but, there is injustice in this stink and I dislike injustice more than I dislike making stink. More on this later probably.
I forgot that Bobby Downey Jr. was in Bowfinger. Weird how changing someone's name that little makes them sound different. I probably would have been more successful in life had I gone by Matthew Helser. I would have undoubtedly been a sports legend had I chosen Matty or Mats. I like this film. Edward Murphy, Bobby Downey, Martin Stevens... Glad I chose Matt; success and wealth seem so stressful.

Supposedly, the Holy Grail has been found. The REAL Holy Grail. The one that some dude named Jesus drank from at some sort of celebrity dinner or something. There was a guy named Matthew there (see, he is famous). How can they prove that is THE Holy Grail? It has been on display in a church in northern Spain but had to be removed after this new revelation (odd choice of words) was made public. Now people are swarming the area. What the heck for? Why do we humans think we are better-off if we see famous things or holy things? I cannot even calculate all of the money I have spent over the years just to see stupid stuff and buildings... Maybe it is more of an American thing but we sure are sheep. Lambs LOL.

I am really down on myself lately. I believe that most people are tough on themselves. I am sure that is what keeps us going but also gives us high blood pressure and strokes... Nobody really knows what is going on in someone else's head. Even with me writing this blog most days and blabbing on Dirty Laundry Podcast just about every week nobody knows what stupid crap is rattling around in my melon. I don't have any deviant thoughts or psychopathic fantasies (that I know of) but, I beat the crap out of myself constantly. Is that what keeps us going or is it counterproductive? Maybe the weather turning cold again is in my kitchen. You know where the weather is warmer? Where my family, minus me, is going for Easter! Maybe, while they are gone, I will pretend I am in Key West and drink a lot and go to work hung-over every night. That looks so romantic in movies. I have to work that out so I don't go to work buzzed. Working nights makes that tricky. I guess drink from 0600 - 1500 and then sleep until 2100 and get ready for work. Why aren't there 24-hour saloons? Drinking those hours prettyy much dictates that I will be drinking alone most of the time and that is the sign of something or other.

I have to go down and clean the kitchen (the real kitchen and not the one I spoke of in that last paragraph) among other things. Sorry to come across so blue today. I have to get it out somewhere. It is a new month and it has been blogged here many times that the end of the months seem to be my mattstruation time. Maybe I am on the other side of my time of the Matt. Thanks a lot for stopping by. I will be more cheerful tomorrow. If you don;t see a blog tomorrow you will kow that I did not achieve said cheerfulness. TTTT..MITM (out)