Shawn F. is a Freaking Genius!

This friggin' itching is driving me even more crazy than I usually am. When I got home from work yesterday morning I took a couple of Benadryl tablets/capsules/whatevers instead of using the ointment. I slept from 08:00 to 15:00. I cannot remember the last time I slept seven hours in a row. Then I made garlic bread and mostaccioli and then baked it in the oven. I probably smelled like garlic all night; I love that smell. I always try to cut it razor-thin like in GoodFellas but I don't actually use a razor blade like in the film. I have a favorite knife and I would feel like I was cheating if I didn't use her. I then managed to get my pre-work slumber in. I was groggy for a bit but I didn't feel tired at all through the night. That sleep deal really works. I am going to try that again one of these days.

My buddy Shawn commented on my blog-post from a couple of days ago (May 6th) and I will copy and paste what he wrote right here:

My own poison plant story: cleared brush by hand to dig pet grave in total darkness. "Brush" was poison ivy. Entire upper body cracked, oozing that yellow pussy stuff. Entire late summer / autumn 2002 of absolute hell. Years of aftereffects. I still have one "volcanic pustule" left.

That OOB thing you're describing sounds a lot like an inner ear problem. Queasiness, vertigo, and then strange mind effects (mostly due to crazy sensory input — your brain tends to flail when your gyro goes out of whack). Hallucinogens don't usually give you that queasiness.

I imagine he has heard this before but he is a freaking genius. Most of what he mentions confirms all of my thoughts. I guess that makes me a freaking genius too, huh? More likely, we are both completely mad. I have been recounting my activities and the opportunities where I could have contracted the poison that is now in charge of my existence. I have thought about the way I entered the phase of my life that I am in now (itching and scratching and wincing constantly) and had decided that it was probably the night that we were at the cabin down south and I gathered brush for the fire we had the last night we were down in DeSoto, IL.. I grabbed a whole bunch of  dried branches and logs and then traipsed through the brush willy-nilly picking dried grasses and weeds and such. I am sure my city-boy hands grabbed poison oak, poison ivy, sumac, marijuana... Gloves-schmuvs. That fire did really flame-up nicely and it smelled surprisingly good. I was pretty hungry for Dorito's too now that I recall. I gathered all of the stuff myself, thankfully, so nobody else has to keep enjoying the souvenir I will never forget and maybe have as a CONSTANT reminder of this trip. Most of my lower body looks like I am a burn victim right now.

SooNer thaN I'd like it seeMs

As far as the OOB (out-of-body) "experiences" I have been encountering - I have suspected that I have had an inner-ear thing going on for quite some time. After I take showers, most every night of my life, I usually Q-Tip the insides of my ears. Please don't tell me how that is bad for me or whatever because I don't really care what is bad for me; I am about immediate gratification/satisfaction - have you seen my face and body? It's a virtual "don't do this" poster board. Anyway, when I dry out my ears (plural) sometimes I can feel that hallow-echoy feeling deep in my brain (yes, I appreciate the irony in that). That feeling one sometimes gets in their gulliver after swimming. I believe Dr. Shawn is probably right about that too. I never tied the ear infection with the OOB thing together. Maybe Shawn will have to be my personal spiritual advisor / Dalia Lama.

Side note - when we were kids my brother laid-down on the upper bunk of our beds with a Q-Tip in his ear and punctured his ear drum. Blood gushed down on my lower bunk as he screamed so, I am very aware of what could possibly happen. I am pretty careful, as you might imagine.

Today is finally warm outside and I cannot even wear shorts on my day off because my legs make me look like a leper or a burn victim. I guess that would take all of the emphasis off of my face though so I may consider it. Life is all about mis-direction. I am going to take Jeff over to PetSmart to get a snip, snip here a snip, snip there and a little of lattie da soon so I had probably start wrapping-up.

 I am not going to mention that the new Dirty Laundry Podcast is available: to listen to and download free on iTunes, at that link in red there and many various other ways. Oops.

Thanks a lot for stopping-by. I will let you know if Shawn has any openings to solve your problems. I hope I get referral points. Have a great rest of your day and night. If we pass on the street just look away and keep moving. I won't be offended or try to approach you. Joseph Merrick is one of my personal heroes right now. It's not bad enough that the poor guy had Elephant Man Disease (Neurofibromatosis or Proteus Syndrome) but they called him John Merrick in the movie about him and his name was Joseph. Why would that be? Joe Merrick or Joseph Merrick would have been just as good and John Merrick, and, more accurate. I think I will blog again tomorrow - I enjoy blogging at you. We have to record another show too. TTTT...MITM (out) TA!