Pretend Like There's No World Outside

I have a lot of decision to make over the next few months

I am in a horse poop mood today. Maybe it is the rainy weather though I have always loved rain and thunderstorms. Last night Cha Cha and I went out with our great friend Greg and we had a super time. We went for dinner (I was 100% good on the Whole 30 which is very difficult for me at a Mexican restaurant) and we sat outside on their patio and, though it misted for a bit for a short while, the weather was perfect. We even just sat there while it rained. I try not to complain about what is going-on with me but I cannot help but feel blue most of the time. Cha Cha had told the doctor several weeks ago that I was depressed and I thought she was crazy (pun intended) so I was put on an anti-depressant along with everything else. I started with some free samples and they seemed to help I guess. But, I ran out and the doctor contacted Walgreen's with a prescription. Walgreen's sent me an email that a thirty-day supply would be over $300 because of some rigmarole with the insurance and I told them forget it. So, I called the doctor back and he straightened it out and now, with my insurance, it's "only" $60 for 30 pills. I have some kind of a savings card for this particular medicine so I am going to go back over there and see if I can get another retro $30 off. Even if not I have it for next month. Maybe I am depressed from being off of the medicine for a week or so as forced that to the top again. When we are on our European tour don't be surprised if Cha Cha comes back alone. I am considering becoming an expatriate. Come to think of it, since I was born in Germany, maybe I am an expatriate now and this will just be the native son returning home. Imagine the parades and new holidays! Maybe Jill would just stay with me. We'll keep paying the mortgage and all so the kids have a house... They can even rent out some rooms and make some cash.

I know people are always being nice when they tell me to quit fretting over things all the time. I know they are just being nice and trying to make me feel better but I wish they would not do that. No MATTer what people say I am going to feel bad about forgetting some things (not everything I forget bothers me but forgetting certain things really does bother me a great deal and it always will). I am going to try to keep it unapparent that I am bothered from now on though. I noticed my memory going the last couple of months while I was still working; well before I fainted the first time and could not go back to work. I had early signs that something was wrong but you don't really know that signs are signs until after the event(s) the signs were trying to tell you about occur do you?

I just told Jill this morning that I had fainted again in the backyard yesterday. I was doing pretty well, I though, for the past couple of weeks so I was surprised. I didn't want to tell her last night and spoil the evening. Hopefully, the three-day EEG starting Monday will bare fruit. The the nuttier than a fruitcake kind of fruit though. I think everything is just getting to me all of a sudden. Oh my goodness, it is May 30th. I seriously had no idea it was the end of the month until right now. Maybe this is why I am in this funk; it is my time of the month (if you've read the blog for awhile you know that I am always moody during my cycle which is the end of each month). I hope that is all this is.

"Makin' banana pancakes... ain't no need to go outside" 

This morning I made banana pancakes for breakfast. It is withing the Whole 30 way of cooking / eating and they were amazing. There are only two ingredients: bananas and eggs. I made four variations since this was the first time I made them. I made: regular banana pancakes, coconut-banana, macadamia-banana and banana-coconut-macadamia. Of course, the variations required extra ingredients - coconut and macadamia nuts. They were all awesome. No syrup... needed. I am tempted to make them into muffins later to see how that goes. If you want specifics on the recipe let me know but that is about the whole deal. The next time I make them I am going to play THIS SONG. The whole song fits even with the "raining outside" part. I have always loved that song and cannot believe I didn't think about playing it while I was cooking these. King of ironic that I cannot believe I didn't think of something huh? Cooking always needs a soundtrack. I may make them again for lunch or dinner to right this wrong.

I am gonna stop because I am just getting crabbier and crabbier. Maybe I will take a nap. Maybe I am already thinking about making and cleaning-up for lunch and then turning around making and cleaning-up for dinner. Oh yeah, and the shopping for both. Thanks for letting me bitch and whine: I appreciate the therapy. It will be better when my cycle ends. I think I will blog tomorrow because Monday I go into the hospital and don;t know what time I will be able to blog. TTTT...MITM (out) TA!

The Miscreants! Starring Kevin Costner and Matt Helser

I am starting this blog early because the last two didn't get posted until nighttime. I never said when I would post the blogs but I would like a little consistency. I know you can read them anytime you want (which may be never) but I want them to be there if/when you feel like reading. Maybe I should quit fixating on that and just write when I feel like writing and when I can write. Maybe television and such has gotten us to become too miserly with our time? Time to me is not quite as relevant as it was just a few months ago. I was, and have been for most of my life, a Time Nazi. I always found that term amusing (even though Nazis were one of the most despicable groups of all history). Maybe that is almost how much people hate being told where to be when? Over the past couple of months I have learned a lot about time. I have learned that is is probably no longer on my side. I have learned it is very helpful and calming to be able to do, for the most part, what you need to do when you want to do it. As long as it gets done in a fairly timely manner who cares? See, there's that word "timely." There are many things that have to be done by a certain time but not everything does. Last night, for instance, I was tired at 20:16 so I went to bed at 20:16. Now I am awake at 04:31 and I had 8 hours and fifteen minutes of sleep (70% or, six hours and 31 minutes, of "motionless sleep"). At least that is what my double-naught spy watch tells me. That is why Gilligan was always so laid-back and chilled out. He didn't have to be controlled by time. The Skipper must have had a watch hidden somewhere. I also believe he had to have a stash of Slim Jim's or something stashed somewhere. Probably with all of The Howells' wardrobe changes.

I remembered a dream again last night. I wrote about it in my tiny little book with an itsy bitsy pen so let me see if I can make out what is says... Kevin Costner and I were working on a movie together (no, I do not go to sleep with the television on and no, I had not recently see a Costner movie). It was a buddy cop flick where I was supposed to be the comic relief sidekick partner. The name of the film was The Miscreants! While off work we shared a house, during shooting, on a cliff overlooking the ocean, The side that faced the water was all windows. It was a gorgeous view. Many nights we went out clubbing and, of course, everybody knew him and I was relieved that nobody knew who I was. We would fight about the food we were eating all the time. Actually, he was bitching about it all the time. That is sooooo Kevin, I started calling him Cos but that seemed too Cosby (even though the S-sound was different) and then I was calling him Cost but that just sounded stupid. So, Kevin worked fine. We got home from shooting one day and I made dinner while he did whatever Kevin does. I just whipped together some macaroni and cheese because I was beat and he totally freaked-out on me, Ingrate. He also got angry because we had the wrong kind of water in the house. He would always be nice to everyone all day long but I guess I was just his bitch punching bag at night. That was okay with me because I got to work with Kevin Costner - I figured it was just the price of admission. I just planned to become a bigger start than he had ever been and be the bigger man to him one day.

I don't see Ernie there - hopefully he got sucked up in the vacuum

I also woke-up remembering why my back has hurt since 1988 up until last week when Kevin Donka stopped the pain. I am sure I have written about it before but it has been a long time. Cha Cha and I had just gotten married and we lived in North Aurora on Shagbark Lane in an apartment. We had a Yorkshire Terrier name Ernie who lived there with us. One winter morning Ernie had to do his business so I, being the slave to my dog as I was,  got all bundled up and we headed out. When you exited the building you'd have to go down about four outside concrete steps to get to the sidewalk below. The sidewalks were clear so Ernie and I headed out. He went out and I, holding the leash, followed. Of course I had to open the door because he was useless that way. I stepped onto the top step and went down on my back like a sack of potatahs (not potatoes). The small of my back hit that corner where the top step goes down to begin the second step. There was a clear sheet of ice on all the concrete steps and I went down all of them with my spine as my toboggan, If anybody would have seen it they would have thought they were watching a Laurel and Hardy film. I ended up lying at the bottom like a slug and the leash had come off of my wrist and man's best friend (that asshole Ernie) just ran-off and left me for dead. I don't think we had Ernie long after that. Matt's best friend - HA! He had always hated me and I think this was the opportunity he had always been waiting for. Little jerk. I bet he is still smoking turds in doggie hell for that one. Actually, he would probably like that - dogs seem to like to sniff and eat poop. At least he always like Jill - maybe she put him up to this know that I think about it.

It is still only 06:07 and I am almost done blogging. This is so much nicer than being interrupted to have to do things and then not getting back to writing for hours.

You mean I have to follow the rules too? I thought I was exempt!

It looks like former Yorkville, Illinois (just down the road a piece) teacher and wrestling coach J. Dennis Hastert may be going to Club Fed soon. Maybe the "J" stands for Jailbird? He apparently removed nearly $1,000,000 from several accounts and did not report the large withdrawals ($10,000 or more) as is required by law. You would think that, as former Speaker of the House of The United States of America under George W. Bush, he would know the laws. Anyway, there is lots of speculation that he was taking money out as hush money. Wouldn't it be exciting if George W. Bush was implicated? This could make Watergate look like Walt Disney World before it is all done with. I predict (whether proven or not) this made Hastert and the Bush family... lots of money to keep us at war with oil-rich countries. Now I think I want to watch the move W. again. I think it is on Netflix.

Thanks a lot for coming by. I am happy to have the blog doe before 06:30. I hope you have a great day. The sun looks like it is starting to peak out here; I hope does where you are too - you deserve a some sunshine in your life. TTTT (hopefully early again)...MITM (out), Hey, it's Friday! Bonus -TA!

Matty McFly In The Middle

No you CAIN't

I think the worst marketing move in the history of marketing (which started day one of history) was calling that green melon with the red inside with the black and white seeds (though there are not very many black seeds anymore) watermelon. Maybe they were marketing it for the desert. Hey, what happened to the black seeds? Most water melons don't have black seeds anymore. Is there seedism in the melon world? I have never been too much of a watermelon fan but maybe I saw the early signs of the seedism and I think we should all get along.

I said yesterday that I would blog earlier today. I am still working on making that a truth but, it is 12:31 already. I wrote that first paragraph about four hours ago and then I went down and worked on the basement again. I cannot believe how much Shinola we have accumulated in the eleven years. That was eleven years in this house. I bet we brought a lot of stuff from the last house where we lived for nine years too. I found stuff from our wedding in 1988 so that makes it 27 years worth of stuff and there were things from college and from our childhoods... I guess we have things that we have had for over 50 years down there. No wonder it's taking me so damn long to clean the basement. I am getting rid of a lot of things. Don't tell my mom but I found three unopened Halloween cards. I can tell the are Halloween cards because they are in orange envelopes and postmarked "19 OCT 2011 PM 8." I don;t know if we should open them. Maybe I should write "return to sender" on them or "could not deliver" and see if she gets them back and what she says. I also found October 24, 2011's Newsweek magazine. Looks like they are giving Herman Cain a chance to beat President Obama. I feel like I am in Back To The Future IV. I am Matty McFly or maybe just MattFly?

I got a call back from my neurologist and my EEG is scheduled for Monday now. I have not heard anything back about the sleep study so, I am assuming, they were just doing the old placating the patient to get him off the phone deal. I think, given an option (which means that I will die if I do not get to a hospital in 15 minutes), I will not be going to Kishwaukee Community Hospital unless it is to visit someone or turn around in their parking lot. Maybe not even to turn around in their parking lot. Upon reflection KCH is a good hospital but the sleep study are, though the study itself was run well, seems a bit amiss (I may be a unique situation maybe?).

Now it is 15:25. This late blogging is becoming a habit isn't it? I am not sure if it makes much difference because you can read it when you want but, if you want to read it in the morning you will have to weight until tomorrow. I could pick you up in the DeLorean and I could take you to tomorrow morning. Or, I could get in the DeLorean and go back and post it earlier even though I am writing it now. I am scared to get too much into the Back to the Future stuff because this is the year that the Cubs, according to the movie, are gonna win the World Series. They are within striking distance being in second place behind some team that is in first. Even Sporting News picked them to win the Series this year. When I am in France I am going to bet on the Cubs to win the World Series. Can you do that? Would they mail me my winnings?

Speaking of gambling - I wonder if American Pharoah will win The Belmont Stakes to take The Triple Crown? The last time  horses won The Triple Crown were in 1978 (Affirmed), 1977 (Seattle Slew) and 1973 (Secretariat). I remember as a kid how big of a celebrity Secretariat was. I bet not near as many people know about American Pharoah as knew about Secretariat or even Seattle Slew or Affirmed. We have so many other things that we seem to have to keep up on these days.

It is now 18:22 and shopping was done, dinner was made, kitchen was cleaned and I am on the patio with Crosby, Stills & Nash singing Southern Cross while I am eating walnut-crusted pork tenderloin on salad greens with a raspberry balsamic vinaigrette and pan-roasted brussels sprouts (yes, they are brussels sprouts and not brussel sprouts) and squash. I may have to open my own restaurant. This pork is really, really good. And, I am eating it cold (after kitchen clean-up).  I am not much of a pork man or a squash man but wow, these are good. I don't like cucumbers either but I ate them in one of my dishes last week too. Funny that I don't like cucumbers but I love pickles and tzatziki sauce. Okay, it is almost seven at night and I am gonna end. Before I do...

It seems pretty clear-cut to me but I'm a few marble short of a full sack

I was look through some of my medical papers while the pork was cooking at 375 degrees Fahrenheit. I found the paper that they gave me when I left Kishwaukee Community Hospital at the end of my sleep study and I might call my friend Sue the nurse again tomorrow. It states: "...Your final results will be sent to your physician usually within 5-7 business days..." Okay, let's say for the sake of me being the bigger Matt that Saturday and Sunday and Memorial Day are not "business days" for a hospital (whatever you do don't get in a car accident on a Saturday or Sunday or get a finger blown off on the Fourth of July with a firecracker because there is no business at the hospital). I had my study done last Tuesday (the 19th) today is day six. They told me yesterday that it would be another week so, without counting the Saturday and Sunday coming up, that would be eleven days. I may have to give Sue the nurse a call tomorrow because that is day seven (with the three "weekend" days). I am going to have a difficult time letting this one drop.

Okay, I am going to relax before I sleep. I have felt odd all day and really, really tired. I started taking another medicine yesterday (the one I am supposed to take "AT 5PM") and that may be effecting me. By the way, since I was cooking, I didn't take it until about 17:40. Oh well, we all have to die of something. Thanks for waiting around for me to get this completed. I will try again to get the blog done earlier tomorrow. I will try really, really hard. Have a great rest of your night. TTTT...MITM (out) GO CUBS!!!! I think I spelled Blackhawks wrong there and my fingers were crossed! TA! (I did not even attempt to proofread - sorry)

Some of Today's Blog Occurred Live

Cha Cha when she visits me for my EEG if and when it gets rescheduled

Boy, did my plans flip-flop today a couple of times. I was under the impression that my three-day EEG (I think I may have said it was a sleep study but it is an EEG) was Friday. Cha Cha informed me that it was today so I pulled-out the papers and, of course, she was correct. So I packed my suitcase last night and was all ready to go. Kevin Donka was going to come over today and give me another Chiropractic work-over so I had to get ahold of him and I cancelled that. I was scheduled to be at Central Dupage Hospital at 11:00 to get some kind of helmet with electrodes attached so they could try to read my brain for three days and nights. Anyway, I received a call at 08:03 this morning that there was no room at the inn; I think her actual words were, "we have no beds available so you are going to have to reschedule." I told her that I would like to do that right then to which she told me I would have to do that with the doctor who scheduled the EEG. I have so many damn doctors and specialist working on whatever is wrong with me I never remember who sets which procedures and medicines... Maybe this is part of the test for my mind. Luckily, I keep all of the cards and papers and orders... in one binder and, luckier still, I have Cha Cha. So, I left a message with my neurologist's nurse (or whoever answered the phone) and have not heard anything back since my call at 08:31 this morning (they opened at 08:30). Maybe they are trying to figure out when they can get me in but I feel like I am just a big dollar sign (or, my insurance company is) so they don't care too much about me personally.

So, I called Kevin and he was kind enough to come over and align me again (because he DOES care about me). I always like visiting with him and I like good flow to my brain too. It is weird calling a doctor and being able to get ahold of him.

My suitcase is still packed and the lawn is mowed and my spine feels straight and my back still does not hurt after him fixing it last week after having a back ache for as long as I can remember. I still have to work in the basement more and I promised I would cut up the watermelon in the kitchen for Jill.

Don't F--- with me fellas!!!

It sure was a beautiful day today. I love hearing the birds singing and having the yard mowed. I have been feeling kind of weird in the head this afternoon though. I hope it is not leading up to something because I think I have been doing pretty well for a week or so. Maybe I am just sleepy.

Oh yeah, speaking of sleep... I was told that I should hear something within five-to-seven days about the sleep-study results. If I did not hear anything I was to call my primary physician who ordered the study. I called his office at 10:47 to see what they know. Well. nearly six hours later, I have not heard a peep about that either. I also checked MyChart (I wrote about that before but, in case you missed that, it is for doctors and patients to communicate kind of like emails). I had had problems with MyChart before and them not contacting me back and I got a snotty message back saying how they "have 24 hours to respond..." So, even though it was a phone message that I left I promise you that, if I do not hear from them by 10:47 tomorrow morning, I may become ugly Matt. Like Bruce Banner, I have an Incredible Hulk side. Cha Cha has seen it many times (not ever aimed at her) and she almost always roots for the evil Matt because I am very patient before I release the beast. I have to come-up with a name for my evil side. Suggestions are welcomed. Angry Matt or Mean Matt are boring. Supposedly, according to Cha Cha, I have a look in my eyes when this occurs that says "don't F with me" and puts fear in the hearts of men, women and beasts."

Coincidentally (I am not sure if it is irony or coincidence) I just now got a call from my primary care physician's office regarding the sleep study results. She said that she talked to the people at Kishwaukee Community Hospital here in DeKalb where I had the sleep study done and they said it could take up to a week. I told her that the study was done a week ago yesterday. She was told that the doctor hasn't even looked at them yet. Did the lady at KCH mean it could take another week? I am going to have to call over there myself I guess or, better yet, I may have Cha Cha drive me over there. HULK SMASH!!!! Somebody is gonna see the Oh Face. "Oh, why is this guy turning green and growing out of his clothes?" Why do we let the medical industry charge us what they do and get away with this? I seriously may have to go over there because my doctor is obviously not going to go to bat for me. Customer Service is the opposite of Medical Care. Care shouldn't even be included.

You are not going to believe this but I swear on what is left of my mind that it is true... My primary physician's office just called and said they spoke with the KCH sleep study department or whatever and they said it could be a week before they get the information. I told her that it has already been eight days. I was not tough on her because I know she is stuck in the MIDDLE. She suggested that I call KCH and speak with them directly and I may get results. I called and got the sleep study department and spoke with a lady who said it could be another week. I told her that I was told it would be five days to a week and it is been eight days. She then made the blunder that brought out the beast. She said, "plus there was a Saturday and a Sunday and Memorial Day in there so technically it has only been three day." I said,"firstly your math is flawed and secondly, are you telling me that your hospital was closed on Saturday, Sunday and Memorial Day?" So she quickly saw she was out of her league and sent me to Sue the nurse. Sue tried the same B.S. but then, when I was still Red Matt she said she will send an email to the interpreting physician saying that I am in a hurry for my results." I realize she is probably B.S.ing me or the physician will get it and just ignore it but at least she is pretending to do something. Isn't that what we all really want anyway?

We'll be right with you!

And, in all the commotion I will probably die anyway because I got a new medicine today and the label says "take one a day at 5PM." Because of all of my calling and arguing so I could pay these people thousands of dollars for crappy service I didn't take the pill until 17:01. That one minute will be the death of me. Maybe that was their plan all along. Collusion!

I sure have done a lot of medical blogs since November haven't I? I am stressed and exhausted now and think I am going to go and take my stress out on a watermelon that I promised to cut-up for Cha Cha. That knife is gonna make the red flow and the guts (seeds) will  just get thrown away. Sounds like good stress relief. Thank you for stopping by to see a typical day in my life recently. I am happy to have spent time with you and Kevin and Fabio and Cha Cha when she gets home. I like to accentuate the positive and be entertained by everything else. Thanks a lot for letting me vent and seeing it live (sort of). I will blog earlier tomorrow. I still don't know when my EEG is scheduled. That battle may be tomorrow. TTTT...MITM (out) TA!

A Dream is a Nightmare Your Mind Makes

I have not been scared yet - just perturbed

Since I told you about my dream from Sunday night yesterday and I remember my dream from last night I feel I need to tell you about this one too. I rarely slept long enough or deeply enough to remember my dreams until very recently sot his is a big deal to me. Last night (in my dream) I arrived at a pretty fancy hotel, checked in and headed to my room. There was a huge party going on in my room. I could not get any of the people to leave. There were 50 to 100 people crammed into the room with loud music and people stuffed in the room. They were on the beds and pouring out the windows. I could not get them out. At least it was an integrated party: there seemed to be people of every race and ethnicity and gender and sexual or sexual orientation. I am happy that, even in my dreams, I am no a racist or a sexist, I just remember trying to get them out and they would not leave. I was with a friend who I have traveled with several times and he was being very little help and he just disappeared. My dreams seems to be based around turmoil (at least the last couple of nights). I know they are trying to tell me something and I will piece it all together soon, I am certain that it is centered around me losing my marbles and my seizures.


As I have written several times - I write about these things because they are entertaining and I like to be able to look back at what was going on when I cannot remember anything. I still forget quite a bit but I have not passed-out in a couple of weeks. I have had weird episodes when I have a difficult time going up stairs without using the handrails for fear of falling down the stairs but that could just be me being tired or only having nine toes. I think it has something to do with my mind problems but I cannot say that for certain.

I planned on mowing the lawn today but, tut tut looks like rain. So, instead I will continue to organize the crawl space. I was up in there yesterday looking for photos and videos so we can embarrass Fabio at his graduation party in a month or so. I am sure I have been told the date of the party but I cannot recall - not that unusual for me these days. If the rain holds-off I may mow the lawn later too.

I do not know what I would do without these incredible people

Last night I made grilled chicken salad from the Whole30 book. The recipes are delicious but they are very intensive to prepare. The kitchen is usually a disaster when I am done cooking but, fortunately,  I have: an Executive Chef, a Sous Chef, an Expediter, a Line Cook, a person who just preps the food, a Saute' Chef, a Fry Cook, a Grill Cook, a Salad Chef, a Pastry Chef, a Dessert Chef and an entire staff to order the food and clean the kitchen. I have never been disappointed in any of their work. They do whatever that I need to have done without me even having to utter a single word. It is as if we are all one person.

I was very disappointed to see the Chicago Blackhawks lose last night;it was a very exciting game. I was, however, happy to listen to my favorite sports team of all (the St. Louis Cardinals) win with a walk-off extra-inning home run. I think it is so cool riding in the car and listening to Mike Shannon and John Rooney call the game from St. Louis. I know I have talked about the free APP At Bat but if you are a fan of a team that is not in your local broadcast area you have to get it. Both of our main cars have WiFi capabilities and it plays right from the car speakers like we were in St. Louis. I get excited by such simple things.

It is a bit after 10:00 so I had better get cracking on the crawl space. Thanks for slowing down for a bit. I will be back tomorrow to tell you about what kind of vandalism someone perpetrates upon me in my dreams. Have a great day - stay dry mostly. TTTT...MITM (ghost) TA!

People Are In Our Lives For Reasons

Happy Memorial Day. In case you are unaware, as you may be in another country other than The United States of America. Memorial Day is the day that we honor those who fought and died for our country while serving in the military. I think some people confuse it with Veterans Day. Veterans Day is the day that we honor all people who have served in the military while Memorial Day is the day that we remember all of the people who have died, while in the military, to protect our country.Memorial Day used to be called Armistice Day. Memorial Day is always on the last Monday in May. I am not sure why they picked that day but I can think of three possible reasons (only my speculations) - they put it on a Monday so we would get a day off work and school so we would truly appreciate it, they have it in May because "mayday" is the international distress signal. And, the weather is usually a little warmer for a nice three-day weekend. No MATTer what day it falls on I thank all of the military veterans who have given their lives for our freedoms. I do not, however, discount the veterans that lived through wars and peace times for their services.

The Whole30 (the 30-day guide to TOTAL HEALTH and FOOD Freedom) program is still going well. Day four just began with cantaloupe for breakfast (I have never been completely sure what the difference between cantaloupe and musk melon is but I am pretty sure it was cantaloupe). So far, I have mostly been using recipes from their book (included in the book) for dinners. The first night I made the Classic Chili recipe. The next night we had Chipotle (not nearly as many things on my salad as I would have previously gotten - no corn, no black beans, no cheese, no rice...). Last night I made Shepard's Pie. For breakfasts I have made Kitchen Sink Scrambled Eggs (much better than the title would suggest) and we just had the cantaloupe today. Yesterday we went out for breakfast with Cha Cha's sister. I had tomato juice and two poached eggs and fruit. Other than making the Shepard's Pie, which was Hell because I did not pre-cut and measure the ingredients as I usually do, everything has been delicious and easy. The Shepard's Pie would have been easy too if I had prepared as I almost always do. I was rushed and messed-up because of that - it will not happen again.

I have been drinking coconut water; some mixed with pineapple, some with mango and some just straight, I love it but Cha Cha hates it. As my parents would always say, "good, that's more for me." I have mainly been drinking regular water.

I am watching Band of Brothers right now for probably the fifth or sixth time. I think this is the best mini-series, or whatever you'd call it, ever made. As far as war-related movies it is probably even better than Private Ryan. It was made by HBO so they are playing all episodes back-to-back for Memorial Day. It is also available on HBOGo. I bet it is also available on DVD. I cannot recommend it more unless you are opposed to violence and realistic war-time movies. Of course, there is blood and death and limbs being blown-off...

My favorite sister-in-law Kara gave me a Samsung watch that works with my iPhone. I cannot begin to say how nice that was and how grateful I am. I even got a compliment on it at Chipotle from thre lady at the counter. Apparently, these are highly revered. It tells me when anybody calls me (and I can talk to them on the phone if I wish). It takes videos and photos right from the watch. People cannot even tell that I am video-taping them or taking their picture if I don't want them to know. It tells me when I get emails or Facebook updates or when St. Louis Cardinals games score change. It measures my sleep (I will get to that more later). It shows me the weather forecasts. It measures my exercise (steps, heart rate...). It has a phone on it so if my "condition" acts-up I can call 911 or a taxi or something. It shows my calendar / to do list. I feel like Maxwell Smart with this fancy gadget. Kara is in my life for a reason (more than one actually) but more about that in a bit.

I said I would talk about the sleep part. When I go to bed I hit the "start" button on the Sleep icon. Last night the watch says I hit the button to go to sleep at 21:33 and I stopped it at 06:58. It says that I slept for nine hours and 24 minutes (I am not sure how long it was from when I hit the "start" button before I fell asleep but this had to be fairly close). It also says that I was motionless for 89% of that 09:24. I suppose it can tell if the watch moves a lot as if I turned on my side or got up to go to the bathroom... I wish I had had the watch before I got these sleeping pills because I would have liked to have compared when I was not sleeping as to now when I am. I haven't passed-out in over two weeks now. That is pretty exciting. I think the sleep is probably helping more than anything. I hope all continues to head in this direction - knock on blog.

I am even dreaming which means I am getting REM sleep. I had a dream last night but it was a sad or bad one (some would call that a nightmare I guess). I remembered it for awhile but, for the life of me, I cannot remember what it was now. That is why people keep dream diaries I guess. It's weird how dreams escape us so quickly. I will start writing them down.

Two nights ago I had a dream that I bought a really nice old Victorian house. It was beautiful. The next thing I remember was a bunch of guys entering the house and beginning to paint EVERYTHING purple (kind of an indigo). They were painting the walls and the ceiling and the windows and the appliances and the chandelier - literally everything. All of a sudden my friend from high school (though I have seen her a handful of times since then) Stacee appeared and she shooed them away. They ignored me but she was able to get them out. I sent Stacee a message about the dream and she responded back telling me to Google "head chakra color." Of course, I did, and what I found was really creepy. I found out the violet is the "crown" chakra. Your remember Jack & Jill a and how "Jack fell down and broke his crown..." I have a broken crown so is that what the purple was about? There are many, many sites about chakras but the first one I went to really fit me. Here is the link to my violet chakra if you are interested. I looked at other sites as well and they all fit what I have been dealing with. I believe my mind is trying to solve its own problems and I think Stacee, who has always been a very talented and artistic person, was in the dream for a reason. I was meant to tell her about it so she could steer me in this direction. I honestly feel that the cosmos or fate or destiny or god or whatever name you want to put on it is real. Kevin Donka and Stacee were both meant to be in my life (even though I have known them both since the 1970's) for the situation I am now battling. Kara is in my life too for many reason (right now, among other things, so I can measure my progress with my violet chakra). I have saved a few lives in my life and I know, even though most of them do not even know my name or remember my face, I was made a blip in their lives for that reason. I am not afraid to admit that, if this were the 1960's, I'd be a total hippie with my theories and beliefs..

I started writing this about seven hours ago. Lots of house and yard projects and Cha Cha and I have been watching old videos (yes, I am talking VHS tapes). We are going through tapes trying to get together clips for Fabio's high school graduation party. We have been watching lost of footage of when Splenda was very young (she was four and 11/12th's when Fabio was born). We just got to him coming into the world. Time sure flies - days and years both

I am sure I will have plenty more to discuss tomorrow. Thanks a lot for spending a bit of your Memorial Day with me. Have a rest of the day. TTTT...MITM (out) TA!

Here's a Truck Stop Instead of St. Peter's

EVERYTHING in your body runs through your brain

I am sorry I did not blog yesterday; I was pretty busy all day long and, by the time I got to where I could have blogged, it was so late you probably wouldn't have read it until today anyway so I figured I may as well just blog today. So I am.

Yesterday morning started off with me seeing an old dear friend. We have known each other since I was in sixth grade so, he is actually among the friends that I have had the longest in my life that I still stay in contact with. We were in the Fox Valley Raiders Drum & Bugle Corps together when we were kids. I even took private drum lessons from him. Like almost all friends that you have had since childhood we lost touch. A few years ago he contact me about marching in a parade with a bunch of drum corps people in a group called Fossil Band - Second Time Around. Anyway, he is a chiropractor now (a pretty darn good one to put it very mildly). He reads this blog when he can and, hearing of all my recent medical issues he wanted to give helping me a crack (yes, that was a very poor attempt at humor). So, I agreed and he came to the house yesterday morning. Who says doctors don't make house calls anymore? I had never been to a chiropractor but the thought had always intrigued me. I had always believed that the science (if that is an appropriate term) is a very important tool in curing most medical and physiological maladies. I just had never gotten around to trying it. Kevin, as I said, had been reading the blog and wanted to try to help me. I agreed and he came down yesterday morning and, even though it was just yesterday, I have seen some improvements already. I cannot say, yet, whether or not there is anything change in my mental health but I have seen a change in something that has plagued me for many years. I have had lower back pain (right in the MIDDLE of my back where the spine about six inches tailbone) for as long as I can remember. I did not even tell Kevin about it until he was packing up to leave after working on me. I went on a college tour with Fabio yesterday afternoon, about four hours after seeing Kevin, (walking the entire campus) and there was no pain. I woke up at sixish in bed (the time where it normally hurts the worst everyday) and I had no pain. I cannot think of anything other than the word miraculous. I did not even tell Kevin about that ache until after he was completely done adjusting me so he did not concentrate on that area at all.

A couple of things he did find (and forgive me Kevin if I mis-interpret what you found but it will be close I think) is that one of my legs was an inch longer that the other one (he fixed that) and apparently there was something that led him to believe that I had had a severe knee injury in my past (turns out that belief was related to me losing most of my big toe when I was sixteen). One other major thing that he found was that my C1, C2 and C12 vertebrae were out of whack (he probably said something more professional but I am a layman and I am sure that is obvious). He has worked on thousand and thousand and thousand of people (he really is a big deal in the Chiropractic field - a trainer, mentor...) and he said in all of the people that he has seen he has only seen maybe ten people with that issue. I hope I am getting all of that correct because, as a novice, I felt like a lot was being thrown at me. So, hopefully, by him aligning me and adjusting me all of the messages can now get to my brain and I will no longer have seizures and stop passing-out and forgetting things. I still am MIDDLE-aged so the forgetting things may just be part of that journey. Thanks a lot Kevin and I will look forward to my next meeting and I am already excited about my legs being the same length and my back not aching.

Cha Cha and I had been waiting for a book to come in so we could start our new way of life. The book came in a couple of days ago and we started the new way of eating yesterday .It is a book called Whole30: The 30 Day Guide to Total Health and Food Freedom. Day one was easy. That is always the case isn't it.? We are both very committed and, changing life-styles is always easier when you do them with other people. I haven't started being a swinger yet because I cannot convince her to buy into that one. The Whole30 is just telling us to do what we know what we should be doing and not be doing. It just helps you make smarter choices. I must say that it is easier doing it with someone else. For dinner last night we had Chipotle but we ordered much differently than we normally would (no cheese, no sour cream...). I will not go through the whole program but I will let you know in 30 days if it is working. I may also complain about it here once in awhile. I can have all the fruit I want so I think that will be what gets me though this. It is like no other food regimen I have seen.

Last night Jill and I watched a movie that I saw in the theater way back when I was in college in Carbondale. I had been looking for it for a very long time since then..Jill had never seen it and I was afraid that I had built it up way too much. The movie is The Razor's Edge from 1984. Bill Murray liked the book so much that he told the studio that he would not be in Ghostbusters (1984) if they didn't let him make The Razor's Edge. Jill found it on Crackle. Crackle is similar to Netflix but it is free and, there is always a catch with "free," it has commercials every now and then. It is a period film that starts at the time of World War I. It is about the life journey of Larry Darrell (Murray). That is Bill since Brian-Doyle is in the movie too. The movie was based on a book from 1944 and I believe the film is a remake of a film from the 1940's or 1950's too. It sort of reminds me of a Gone With the Wind combined with Forest Gump. If you watch it and don't like it I blame you for trusting my opinion.

I wrote a note in the MIDDLE of the night. I wrote it in the dark and I think it says "Andy Kaufman changed." Maybe I am referring to when he was dying he was searching for things that could cure him. I am only basing my thought of this from the movie Man In The Moon starring Jim Carrey. I was a huge fan of Kaufman. I like people who are original and think outside of the box. I am also big on shock-and-awe comedy. People who know me well probably don't find that hard to believe. The movie was also directed by Milos Forman who has directed a couple of my other favorite films: One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest and Amadeus. Anyway, getting back to Kaufman, when he was diagnosed with lung cancer (having never smoked, drank alcohol or used drugs) he searched the world for cures - many unorthodox. I think we are meant to go when we reach our expiration date. His was May 16th in 1984 (31 years ago last week). It sure doesn't seem that long ago. I say I wouldn't try anything but, maybe if I we in terrible pain or discomfort I may change my mind. But I would probably forget to remember to forget.I don't think I would try a "psychic surgeon."

Time to hit the yard. Yesterday I spend about four hours cleaning the windows and screens on the house. I wasn't aware that it had gotten so sunny outside. I think we are going to work on the path on the side of the house today. I have been Tim "The Toolman" Taylor for about a month now in between my medical appointments and incidents. I am not sure if the house has even been so clean and organized. That being blogged, I have to get dressed to begin whatever project I need to get done today. I will begin with laundry (AGAIN). Have a great weekend. I will blog Monday even though it is Memorial Day. I wonder if I'll get holiday pay for Memorial Day? Not expecting it but it would be nice. Thanks for stopping-by. TTTMD (Memorial Day)...MITM (out) TA!