The Gayest Blog in America (not that there's anything wrong with that)!

Mr. Winter Snow Advisory Warlock!

We are under a WINTER SNOW ADVISORY! where does the winter snow advisory fall in the realm of snow warning? Blizzard Warning, Blizzard Watch, Snow Warning, Winter Advisory, Snow Watch, Chance of Flurries? I am not sure of the order!

Why every time it is going to snow in the MIDDLEwest is it such a big deal? Most of us have lived here our entire lives and it still seems like a huge surprise to the radio and television stations when it snows in the winter. I would be more concerned if it didn't snow in the winter. every winter I always ask myself, "why do I live in the MIDDLEwest?" Maybe I just hate moving that much. And now maybe it's because it's a bad housing market. When the market improves I will have to come up with another excuse. So, anyway, it's snowing and we're all surprised and I sure hope we survive.
Why (I have so many "whys" today) does it seem like the majority of professional drivers smoke? I am talking about bus drivers, taxi drivers, limo drivers... I passed two gas stations with the parking lots full of buses this morning while the drivers waited for their next age-group to be picked up for school. Outside of each of these gas stations was about 10 - 15 drivers with their neon yellow and orange vests smoking. What is it with driving that a makes the drivers want to smoke? Drinking I could understand with the bus driver thing but I guess they say smoking relieves stress too right?

Have you seen Dolly Parton lately? She is doing a bunch of publicity for her new movie - I don't care what it's called so I am not even going to Google it. People are saying things to her like, "I can't believe you're 65-years-old you look so great." GREAT??? She looks like Jack Nicholson in the Batman movie with Michael Keaton. I think she should have gotten a different plastic surgeon after the last one messed up her naughty pillows. She seems nice but it's okay to be a nice old lady who looks here age.

I heard that we now know "officially" what the "gayest city in America" is according to the U.S. Census Bureau interviews. I worked for the U.S. Census Bureau as an enumerator and based on the surveys that we performed I don't know how this could be determined. There was a question on the survey that asked the people to decide how each individual within a residence was related to them and the only choices that could possible be construed as homosexual are: "other relative," roomer or boarder," housemate or roommate," "unmarried partner," or "other nonrelative." None of these, however, specifies that either of the people are homosexual. "Unmarried partner" could mean Starsky and Hutch were gay...I guess they did live in Bay City which was probably San Francisco so maybe that's a bad example. If they had been cops in SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH the show would have made so much more sense. I am sure the Mormons love that their big city is the "gayest city in America." The next census, if I remember, I am going to try to get everybody in town to say that we are all gay. I want to live in the gayest city in America but I don't plan on moving to Salt Lake City. Do expect me to miss all of this WINTER ADVISORY stuff? What's the most heterosexual city in America? What's the most bi-sexual city in America? Why do we have to break things out this way? Incidentally the other top ten gay cities in order of gayness are: Orlando, Cambridge Massachusetts, Fort Lauderdale, Seattle, Ann Arbor, Minneapolis/St. Paul, Knoxville, Atlanta and Grand Rapids. San Francisco isn't even in the top ten anymore.... very disappointing!

I am very tired and I am thinking that I will have to shovel the driveway before I go to work tonight so I think I had better get some sleep. Thanks for stopping by here to keep your tooties toastie while the weather is getting frightful - - Salt Lake City here I come! In case you didn't get the memo yesterday...the new Dirty Laundry Podcast is loaded for fun. Have a great day. TTTT...MITM (out to the lad of nod so I can be rested to wrestle with old man winter later on) TA!

It's Create Your Own Headline Wednesday (it's a contest)

For you youngins that's an album cover

Happy most likely Hump Day to you...it's Monday for me in case you're keeping score at home.

I am really tired but woke up anyway. I am uploading the Dirty Laundry Podcast right now and it will be up by the time I am done with this blog so please head-on over there to listen to the show when you're done here....it's like the blog on caffeine with music and my Felt Fog (Velvet Fog was already taken).

It seems like the Republican Party may finally be deciding who they like as their Presidential candidate. I am not a very political person I just know what I like be it Republican or Democratic or Independent though for about every election I can remember I have leaned and/or voted for the Democratic candidate. I did like John McCain but he turned into a douche when he finally ran last time so I could not vote for him. I have to say out of all of the Republican candidates that have been traveling around the country in the GOP Traveling Circus Mitt Romney is one that I may consider. Now he has made history in being the first Republican candidate to win both the Iowa and New Hampshire primaries which really mean nothing so I wonder why they make such a big deal about them. They are now to smear one another in South Carolina and they say whoever wins South Carolina always wins the Republican nomination for President. With all of the the shenanigans and all of the stupid jostling that's been done I may be hard-pressed to vote their way since they all look like a bunch of big-top clowns. President Obama has been very smart to keep doing his job and letting the other side do all of his work for him by making themselves and each other look silly. My vote is still up for grabs so now it's time to wow me and America!

For some reason our internet was down just now. I went to publish the podcast and it wouldn't let me. I knew the bill was paid because I just paid that two days ago. They must do maintenance in the MIDDLE of the night when most people are sleeping. I am calling vampire discrimination. It appears to be back up now since it is publishing. I guess I need to add publisher to my resume.

The Kardashian replacements and their husbands/boyfriends

The Super Bowl is drawing near and they are already starting to talk about the commercials that will be made for the huge event(s) that play between the plays of the football game. Isn't it funny how everyone watches the commercials during the Super Bowl but the following week we are skipping through them on our DVR's and complaining about them? That's pretty damn clever of those advertisers. How did they scam us into that one? If the blog or the podcast every gets big enough for a television advertisement I have already consulted our P. R. Department and said we should just blow all of our advertising budget on one commercial spot that one night. Or am I supposed to raise the money and do it now and that's how the blog and podcast get big? Damn, no wonder we're still small potatoes - I need to do a winter car wash to start raising the funds. If the one commercial is good enough people will talk about it for a couple of weeks and seek it out on YouTube... Last year one of the big commercials (that was not a butt crack LOL I mean a crack about her butt...you know what I mean) was a Skechers commercial with Kim Kardahian. The people at Shechers have decided to go a slightly different way with a French Bulldog this year. She's nice to look at but apples to apples I think I'd go with the dog too! Probably a lot less temperamental.

Okay I have to get my wiggle-on. The Dirty Laundry Podcast is official up on iTunes and there is some great new music on this load. You can also find out why Cha Cha has been so down in the dumps lately. Have a great day and I thank you for spending a few minutes with me here. TTTT...MITM (out to raise a billion dollars for a 30 second commercial spot) TA!

The Glaze of Glory!!!!

They misspelled Matt again!

Happy Tuesday. Are you impressed that I actually know what day it is? If it's not Tuesday forget that I said anything. Sorry I didn't blog yesterday but it was a crazy busy day of doing things I hadn't planned on doing and not doing things that I did plan to do, like sleep. It's funny how someone else's actions can dictate how your life may change even if only for a short while. I don't want to say much about that because a great deal of this week's Dirty Laundry Podcast is about exactly that and though I like to steal thunder now and again it isn't prudent to steal one's own thunder since that really isn't stealing if it's already your thunder in the first place. The new show will be up later tonight and there is thunder about why that isn't completed too...I eat lightning and crap thunder. I am excited that we have some new artists / music labels that have allowed us to play their music.

I just walked all over the house looking for my little blogbook that I take notes of seemingly good ideas for the blog. I couldn't find it anywhere so decided to come on back in here and start to try to remember things as I typed and when I came back in here the notebook was lying right next to the keyboard. Yes, I know it was probably always here but I'd rather believe that there is some kind of blogvine intervention or a blogspiracy that just put it here while I was looking for it elsewhere.

Albert Pujols leaving The Cardinals is still weighing on my mind. I have felt bad knowing that he will be out there having to try to get by on only $240,000,000. Doesn't he realize that $150,000,000 in St. Louis will go farther than $24,000,000 in Los Angeles? But now more details of his contract have been made public and it turns out that he also gets four season tickets to every home game of the Angels for the next ten years because he couldn't afford that on his measly salary.... sorry I just got a call concerning the issue I have been dealing with for a couple of days right there that I haven't told you about because it's gonna be on a podcast that isn't quite ready yet. Okay, now where was I? In addition to the four season tickets for the next decade, and I guarantee they are not crappy seats, he gets: a hotel suite for all road games, a luxury suite at the ballpark for his Pujols Foundation for charitable events, "the right to buy a luxury suite between first and third base for all home game..." Wait a minute - a luxury suite "between first and third base?" Are they saying that he gets a luxury suite right on the pitcher's mound? I believe that's what is smack-dab in the middle of first and third unless they are talking figuratively and meaning ON second base. Also by the time he is done he could possible be making up to $268,750,000 based on incentives like: making the all-star team, MVP, play-offs, World Series, winning a Gold Glove, Silver Slugger... I sure hope he's able to make it out there all alone in La La Land!

They're delicious!

We had free Showtime this past weekend. They make it seem like a big deal when they give you a "free" weekend but they are probably really just doing some kind of maintenance and the channels have to be open and they want to make like they like us. I know they try to sell the channels during this time but with the crap they had on there this weekend I doubt they sold much. Whenever there is a "free" weekend like this I go through the whole weekend's guide and set the DVR to record things that we might like to watch later and over this entire weekend I think I set the record button for only three or four things.

Hello my name is Indigo Montoya Matt Helser and I have an iPod addiction. It was Angry Birds and Texas Hold 'em for awhile and now it's Netflix and Breaking Bad. Music and podcasts are on continuous loop on Roz II except during movies and/or music. I am not eager to give up this addiction so I guess I will not. It's more of an Obsession For Men than an addiction so never mind I am not giving it up. No interventions welcome!

I was listening to someone talk to me the other day (IT WASN'T YOU) and I started day-dreaming. Why is it day-dreaming even if you do it at night? Maybe because night-dreaming would mean you were asleep? Anyway, as the story grew longer and longer and more boring and more boring I felt that feeling when you feel like your eyes probably have a weird film on them that we refer to as being glazed-over. Aren't you glad that that "look" of glaze is on the inside and the person you are glazing-over to cannot see the glaze? It doesn't happen to me often because for the most part I am genuinely interested in what people have to say and I am an active listener but there are some times with some people that my eyes become giant Krispy Kremes.

Glazed TTFN!

Okay, I had better wrap up before you get glaze on your keyboard or iphone or whatever you read this glaze of glory on. Have a great day and hopefully the podcast will be up tonight though I am pretty confident that it will be. TTTT....MITM (glazing out!)

Keep Your Butt To Yourself!

I usually end the blogs with thanking you for stopping by and for reading the blog but I want to start today's blog by letting you know that when I say that I really do mean it. It means a lot to me that you take time out of your life to read what I have to say especially since it's usually nonsense. There are so many things that you could be doing and you decide to stop here for a little bit and that makes me really happy even at the end of each month when my Uncle FLOyd usually visits. You can always chalk-it-up to your good deed of the day. Thank you very much!

Keep your stinky butts to yourself

I am extremely tired and have to get to sleep so forgive me if I go astray - like you'd know the difference from any of the previous couple of years worth of blogs.

Why is throwing cigarette  butts out of car windows or on the ground not littering. I passed a place near a storm drain and there were hundreds of poor homeless cigarette butts trying to survive on the streets. They had been abandoned by the ones who previously loved them and kissed them and now they were abandoned like trash in the street. I guess nobody really stops us from littering if we are so inclined. When is the last time you hear of someone being fined or arrested for littering? Give a hoot don't throw you cigarette butts ooot (that's for our Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, North Dakota, South Dakota and Canadian friends. And whoever else speaks like Bob and Doug McKenzie. (incidentally, these are probably among the nicest people in the world)

I am going to make a prediction that there will be a large influx in new children actors on television and in the movies over the next ten years or so. The trend will probably go on indefinitely. In 1980 one out of every 53 births was/were twins and according to statistics finally complied from 2009 one in thirty births resulted in twins. Obviously, well seemingly obvious to me, the great number of fertility treatments has resulted in multiple births. I would not want to begrudge anyone the chance to be a parent but maybe there is a reason that we could not all have children. The reason I say more children actors, you may have already figured out, it because most small children actors are twins due to child labor laws and kids getting tired on movie sets... Mary Kate and Ashley what hath though wrought?

I really hope fertility is decided case by case because I think I know of a group of people who do not need to have children. In Cook County, Illinois (which the largest city in that county is Chicago) it is legal for first cousins to get married if they are over 50-years-old. I am sure it's because after fifty people are not likely to have children so maybe cousins wouldn't reproduce together and have three-headed twins though I would watch their television show if they did. Who really wants to marry their first cousin? Better yet - who wants to get married at 50-years-old? I may shack-up with some dame but I ain't gettin' married over by there! So even though I only gots two broad cousins don't be gettin' no ideas about gettin' your meat-hooks into me cuz cuz I don't swim in my own gene pool! Sorry!!! I may change my mind when I'm fifty, who knows?

Yesterday morning I said I was going to the Meyer store but I changed my mind and went to Meijer instead.

I have a question and I would like to know your opinion/thoughts. Firstly, let me preface this by saying that when I go out to eat I usually tip at about 20%. That is my starting point and even if the server really sucks I generally don't go below 15%. Here is my dilemma/question: do you tip if you order carry-out and pick it up? I say no but I want to know if I am wrong so I can correct this if I find that I may be wrong. A gratuity is usually given to a server for their performance. If I tip on carry-out who gets the tip? The kitchen really did most of the work but you know damn well that the person who took that order over the phone and only handed me a bag is gonna keep that money. I know they work hard too and probably take a lot of crap from a lot of people but...? I guess I tip pizza delivery people but they have to pay for their fuel and vehicle maintenance. I really don't know but I lean toward no. I am open-minded in this MATTer and will decide based on all of your input. And if I do it's probably only a couple of bucks right?

Listen to Dirty Laundry Podcast!!!! (like how I subliminally snuck it in here?)

I heard that the new Celebrity Apprentice  cast has been named. How does Donald Trump have time to spend with Clay Aiken and Lou Ferigno and Arsenio Hall and Tia Carrere and run for President at the same time?. Would his apprentice be his running-mate (Vice President)? Now if Tia Carrere took my carry-out order and she was my 50-year-old twin cousin I would tip her for sure! Lou Ferigno too I think.

I can tell that I am getting very sleepy so I had better grind this blog to a screeching halt - too late. Thanks again for dropping in. I hope you have a great weekend. I will try to discover some cool things in the world over the weekend while I am working so I have a super blog for you on Monday. TTTM....M@ITM (out to hush-a-bye mountain) TA!

Sight, Weight & Reunions/Unions!

I never thought to check the dog for my glasses

I love when I sit down to write the blog and I have no idea what to write. Sometimes I have nothing to blog but I blog it anyway.

I have always had really good eye-sight but with age, like it seems to with most people, that has changed a bit. Hey, why do we call it eye-sight but we don't call it ear-hear or nose-smell? Anyway, I still have really good sight but small words or writing in a poorly lit room have become to look like scribbles. My rods and cones aren't rodding and coning like they used to. I suppose they have been on the job quite a few years and many of them have retired and with the budget cuts and rod and cone crisis they have not hired replacements and are working on a skeleton crew. Anyway, I have been relegated to be one of those people that wears reading glasses (just magnifiers really) when I read. I look like Santa Claus with the glasses on the end of my nose so I can see the stuff I can see without glasses and the stuff I cannot with glasses. So, I have lost misplaced another pair of glasses. I used to try to help Cha Cha find her glasses and wondered how somebody could lose their glasses all the time but now I am one of those glasses-losers that I used to wonder about. It always struck me funny to see people who could not see without glasses looking for their glasses - the irony was never lost on me but now the irony IS ME! I guess I am going to have to get one of those beaded necklaces so I can keep my glasses around my neck like a 1930's librarian but first I have to go get some new glasses today.

Supposedly Justin Timberland proposed to Jessica Biel. I am a big fan of love and I hope this works out for them. They both seem very nice but if they do get married I put the over/under at 3 years. I hate to be cynical about love and marriage but for some reason marriages either doesn't work in Hollywood or maybe some people just do it for more press. I wish them the best and I hope they help to rid my of some of my cynicism. I heard Russell Brand and Katey Perry are getting divorced but my sources on this one are a bit shaky....unless this proves true then my source's stock goes up considerably! Buy low!!!

Speaking of Hollywood break-ups I also heard that Van Halen, with David Lee Roth, are performing together at a small New York club tonight. I was invited but I have to work so I had to pass on the invite (okay I wasn't invited and I probably would have called in sick had I been - allegedly). There are even rumors that they are planning a 2012 concert tour. I will pass along details as they become known to me.

I am hearing all of the stories about all of the newest and trendiest diets since the new year began. I was very heavy as recently as about three years ago and I know what worked for me. People ask me all the time, "how did you lose all the weight?" I respond that I did it the way they told us that would work for all of these years; I ate properly and exercised. I recently stopped eating properly and didn't work-out as much as I should have and the pounds started creeping back on me. Portion-size and food selection are huge (no pun intended). I used Weight-Watchers on-line to get started but then stopped and did it myself after I figured out what I always knew already but that helped me be focused. As far as working out I just started small and then as I started seeing results I pushed a little more and then more... I know this is a big time of year for people to try to lose weight and I write this for you who are trying that and for me so I can remain focused in my goal of losing thirty pounds by summer (15 of which I had already lost but somehow it found it's way home to me).

Okay, if I can see well enough I think I am heading to the Meyer store in St. Charles to get a few pair of new "cheater" glasses. They have a great selection and most of them are less expensive than any other ones I have seen. I think I will pick up some Lean Cuisine and Weight Watchers frozen dinners while I am there too. Have a great day and good luck with all of what you wish to do today and beyond! TTTT....M@ITM (out to try to "see" the world close-up)!

@ - that's all just @

Happy MIDDLEday (Wednesday). I am sorry that I didn't blog yesterday but hopefully the Dirty Laundry Podcast kept you from having withdrawals. The lack of sleep and burning the candle at both ends and in the MIDDLE caught up with me and I knew that I was driving to Chicago last night and that is never a good idea when not at at least 80% effective.

We took the kids to Chicago last night to see Blue Man Group. First we stopped at Ed Debevic's for dinner and then went to the show. Ed Debevic's, if you are not familiar, is a restaurant that appears to be like a diner kind of like in the movie Diner but the wait staff is sorta mean to you. Not really mean but they are extremely rude and if your grandparents went in there by accident they would probably be offended with the terrible service. They throw napkins and straws at you when you ask for them and do that sort of thing. Our waiter commented on my horrible fashion-sense and made fun of Fabio's haircut (it was funny but I will not say what was said for loyalty to my son and knowing how he hates being the center of attention even though he had gone here with his friend before and requested to go here - ironic). The waiter also made fun of Splenda for ordering a veggie burger (she is a total vegetarian) that was made on the same grill as hamburgers calling her a hypocrite. It was always funny as long as you have a sense of humor about yourself. We are all lame in at least a few ways and we have to be able to laugh at ourselves I think. He probably thought that Cha Cha either doesn't have a sense of humor about herself, would take him down or would cry because he didn't make fun of her one time.

We then went to the Briar Street Theater to see Blue Man Group. I love the neighborhood that the theater is in (probably because it's "artsy" and I am "metro-artsical" - I love that new word of mine there) and wished we had just eaten at one of the restaurants by the theater - especially the one that had a HUMONGOUS neon advertising the world's largest or best margaritas or something like that. I guess the sign  didn't do it's job on me since I can't remember exactly what it said. Cha Cha and I have seen Blue Man before and knew the kids would love it. We got there and went to our seats in the fourth row. We put on our ponchos that they supplied us and sat down and waited for the show to start. The show was great and had changed a lot since Cha Cha and I had seen it with Nature Girl and Dr. Richard Guzinya several years ago. I guess that's how you get people to come back is by changing the show. The main message of the show was about modern technology and you know how I love topics that point fun of modern culture and ourselves as I do here just about every day. I was disappointed, however, that I never got anything on my clear plastic garbage bags with arm homes and a hood. Next time I go I am gonna go commando (no poncho) and just wear cruddy clothes instead. I highly recommend the show.

When we first got there I went to the washroom and as I was entering the washroom a man and I almost ran into one another. I said "excuse me" as I always do when something like this occurs and he said the me, "forgive me." He looked like a "pardon me" kinda-person and I don't know that I have ever hear anyone say "forgive me" in a situation like this. I wish I had been thinking and not had to pee so badly because I would have performed the sign of the cross and said "I forgive you my son now go in peace" (or maybe "I forgive you my son now go and pee") but I was ill-prepared and was on a mission that I could not afford to fail. I will have this weapon in my holster the next time this comes up...which it probably won't. There was a hidden double entendre in that last sentence that I didn't even plan - see how metro artsical I am using phrases like double entendre?

What's the deal with "@?" I am a huge fan of language and writing even though I abuse them so but is there a name for @or is it just called "the at sign?" Isn't that the ampersand? I am not sure and I don't want to look it up because then I wouldn't write about it. The reason it came up is when we were driving into Chicago last night from our FAR FAR west cornfield we started discussing how when we go shopping and are checking out most stores now will have their cashiers ask for your email address supposedly to send you great deals & (what's that sign called "the 'and' sign?") coupons and some such lie. I know it's so they can sell my information to someone and they get rich while I get inundated with emails I don't want to get so I always refuse. I have decided that I am gonna make-up fake email adresses to give them because I know the cashier is just doing their job and have to get so many email addresses or get yelled at so I will help them out while screwing with the companies that screw with me all the time with their inflated prices and fake sales and the lot. I am leaning toward "I love crossdressing@aol.com" or "Ihatestoreswhowantmyemail@birdfart.net" or "heybabyletshookup@junglelove.org." Maybe I will just come up with them on the spot depending on my feeling at the time. I thing this could become a new art-form that the Blue Man Group could comment on in later years.

I have today off work but we are going to a family Christmas party at Cha Cha's-side of the family tonight and I have completely shirked my purchasing of an ugly ornament responsibilities. I have to get this done today and hope there are still Christmas ornaments out there or I am screwed. I feel I should have won this contest the last several years but I have been screwed by the committee. I am too competitive even in something like this. Everybody always thinks they're gonna win and I am happy for the tough competition. If and when I do win this contest I want it to be against the very best champions in the world so I hope they keep bringing their A-games so when I finally do win it will taste as sweet as I imagine. Good luck to all of tonight's competitors but I am coming for blood (says the guy who hasn't even bought his ornament yet).

Have a great day and by putting that great big "at sign" on the blog made me decide on a new signature...M@ what do you think? Make sure to listen to the podcast and like us on The Facebook. I am shooting for 1,000 "likers" on the Dirty Laundry Podcast Facebook page by December 21st, 2012. TTTT....M@ITM (gone to buy an ugly ornament) TA!

Let the 2012 Blogs Begin!!!!

He wasn't even from Nicaragua!

Happy New Year! For some reason when I wrote Saturday's blog (which was a bonus in itself) I was thinking Sunday would have been Monday. I am not going to go through the saga of how I never know what day of the week or whether it's AM or PM because I only chew my food thirty times or so. I suppose by saying that I'm not going through it again so I went through it again. So, since I didn't post this yesterday I have already lied this year so I can mark that off my to-do list. Maybe the lie was in 2011 so I still have that to do - drat! That's one that I won't have a hard time accomplishing to be certain. To make up for the lie I also worked-out yesterday (6:00 AM New Years Day).

It's 4:30 AM and Splenda just got home from college about ten minutes ago.

Yesterday Cha Cha and my very good friend Greg Weidorf came to Kajunkles Studio to be on Dirty Laundry Podcast (load #42). You may remember him from load #9. He is our media critic so we talked A LOT about television shows and some about movies since it is winter now and we are all going to be shut-ins in the MIDDLEwest for a great deal of the time. I hope to have the show up today though my parents are coming here so we can have our family Christmas. This is the 2011 Christmas but maybe we'll make it twice as long so we can get the 2012 done now too in case the Mayans' calendar was right and we don't get past December 21st.


Cha Cha was watching reruns of Cheers the other day and I walked into the room. we loved that show when it was on while we were in college. Something that never struck me as odd when I watched it but wonder now....why did the dudes (especially Frasier and Sam) like Diane (Shelly Long)? She was a bitchy, know-it-all, pretentious snob who wasn't that particularly easy on the eyes either.

Saturday night (New Years Eve) was the anniversary of the death or Roberto Clemente. I was a huge fan of his as a yute and still am today. I loved his intensity and ability as a player when I was young but then as I  got older and found how charitable he was he became cemented in my mind as one of my favorites of all time. He died in a plane crash while delivering supplies to earthquake victims in Nicaragua. I watched a movie called Chasing 3000 about his chase for 3,000 hits (which he got the last game which turned out to be his final season). That doesn't ruin the movie because it is pretty much general baseball knowledge. The movie is average and it's really about the story of two kids trying to go across the country to see him reach 3,000 but there is a lot of original Clemente footage which I liked. I was a little creeped-out at the end when I saw that it was made by Maya Entertainment.

I read in the newspaper Saturday that People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) wants Illinois to install highway markers in memory of cows that died in two trucks they were being hauled in flipped. One of the trucks was near Peoria and one near one of the Chicago suburbs. I think these markers are stupid even when they are for humans. So, if I die in a car wreck or near a road or just in a car do not do this to honor me or whatever they are really for; they are a distraction to other motorists and I don't want to be a ghost on the side of the road with a stranger who died looking at my name and some plastic flowers on a sign. I love animals but cattle in trucks most likely were headed somewhere to be slaughtered (just assuming) - I doubt they were on a field trip....they already live in fields. If it turns out that there are signs put up for these cows I am going to buy big stuffed hamburgers instead of flowers and put them in these spots. I will also put signs from the various local burger joints near the signs so people know where they can go and visit the dead cows. PETA could be such a good organization and I would respect them greatly if they didn't act like a bunch of headline-grabbing lunatics throwing paint on people and trying media-grabbing stupid stunts. They're kinda like Jesse Jackson with parlor tricks.

Maybe I could could be behind PETA after all

It's windy outside and I'm windy in here. I hope you have a great Monday (see, I can figure it out when it says it at the top of the computer). Thanks for starting the new year off with me unless you are in Samoa and I think it may already be June by now?  TTTT...MITM (out to edit a long podcast TWSS - I will let you know when it's ready - it may take a while because there was a lot of swearing which means a lot of editing). TA!